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When Shan Xia left Dongyang, Wang Changshi wrote to him to ask for Dongyang's help, saying: "You have inherited the harsh policies, so you can achieve peace and order."
The way to display the utensils is to display more and then accept them sparingly; to display sparingly and accept them all is fine. When rushing to the funeral of a brother, first go to the tomb and then the family, and cry for the position. For the funeral of someone you know, cry in the palace and then the tomb. A father shall not be the son of many sons and the outsiders shall be the next. Brothers with princes shall be beheaded. For minor mourning, the belt, hemp and linen shall not be cut off, and the woman shall return to repay the loss.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
People with the same surname follow the clan and are of the same clan; people with different surnames follow the name and govern the society. Names are written, but men and women are different. If the husband belongs to the father's way, his wife is the mother's way; if the husband belongs to the son's way, his wife is the wife's way. If the brother's wife is called "wife", can the sister-in-law also be called "mother"? Name is the most important thing in human governance, so can we not be careful? After four generations, the mourning period is exhausted; after five generations, the same surname is killed. After six generations, the relatives are exhausted. The common surnames are distinguished at the top, and the relatives are at the bottom. Can marriages be allowed? They are tied by surnames and are not distinguished, and they are tied by food and are not different. Even if a hundred generations, marriages cannot be allowed, this is the way of Zhou.
Duke Ai asked Ru Bei to learn the funeral rites of scholars from Confucius, and the funeral rites of scholars were written there. Zigong watched the wax. Confucius asked, "Are you happy?" He replied, "All the people in the country are crazy, and I don't know how to be happy!" Confucius said, "A hundred days of wax and a day of radiance are not what you know. If you stretch without relaxing, civil and military officials cannot do it; if you relax without stretching, civil and military officials cannot do it. Tension and relaxation are the way of civil and military officials."
Prime Minister Wang said: "I saw Xie Renzu sending someone to the throne. When he spoke to He Ci, he only raised his hand and pointed to the ground and said, 'It is from Er Xin!'"
Zilu said, "I heard from the Master that in funeral rituals, it is better to have more mourning than not mourning. In sacrificial rituals, it is better to have more respect than not respect."
In ancient times, the emperor established six palaces, three wives, nine concubines, twenty-seven wives, and eighty-one imperial wives to listen to the internal governance of the world and to show the obedience of women; therefore, the world was harmonious and the family was orderly. The emperor established six officials, three dukes, nine ministers, twenty-seven great officials, and eighty-one nobles to listen to the external governance of the world and to clarify the male education of the world; therefore, the country is governed when the outside is harmonious. Therefore, it is said: The emperor listens to male education, and the queen listens to female obedience; the emperor manages the yang way, and the queen manages the yin virtue; the emperor listens to external governance, and the queen listens to internal duties. Teaching obedience becomes a custom, the outside and the inside are harmonious, and the country is governed, this is called great virtue.
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