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Duke Ai asked Confucius, "What is the great ritual? Why do gentlemen talk about ritual with such respect?" Confucius said, "I am a small man, not qualified to know ritual." The duke said, "No! I am talking about it." Confucius said, "I have heard that ritual is the most important thing for the people to live. Without ritual, there is no way to respect the gods of heaven and earth, no way to distinguish the positions of the ruler and the minister, the superior and the inferior, the old and the young, no way to distinguish the closeness of men and women, fathers and sons, brothers, and the relationship between relatives and strangers. A gentleman respects this and teaches the people with what he can, and does not abolish the festival. After things are accomplished, he will then prepare the carvings and ornaments to continue. After they are in compliance, he will talk about funerals, prepare the tripods and sacrificial vessels, set up the pork and basil, repair the ancestral temple, and worship at the right time and order the clan. Then he will make his house comfortable, dress modestly, and humble his palace. He will not carve the table on his car, nor carve the utensils, nor eat two different kinds of food, so that he can share the benefits with the people. The gentleman of the past practiced ritual. ”

A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.

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