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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Wang Rong was a young man, he visited Ruan Ji. Liu Gongrong was also present. Ruan said to the king, "I happen to have two buckets of fine wine, and I would like to drink it with you. That Gong Rong has no right to drink it." The two men exchanged cups, and Gong Rong did not get a single drink. But when it came to talking and discussing drama, the three of them were no different. When someone asked him about this, Ruan replied, "Those who are more honorable than you have to drink with; those who are less honorable than you have to drink with; only those who are honorable as you have to drink with you can not drink with you."
Emperor Ming of Wei asked his younger brother Mao Zeng to sit with Xiahou Xuan, and people at that time said it was "reeds leaning against jade trees."
The king comforts the officials and the women in the palace; the officials comfort the elders in the house and the younger nephews. The king and the officials honor their parents, wives, and eldest sons, but not their concubines; the scholars honor their parents, wives, eldest sons, and concubines. If a concubine has a son, the parents do not honor his corpse. In all cases of honoring corpses, the parents are honored first, and the wife and children are honored later. The king honors his ministers, the parents hold their sons, the son honors his parents, the wife serves her uncles and aunts, the uncles and aunts honor their wives, the wife holds her husband, and the husband holds his wife and his brothers. Honoring corpses is not the place for the king. In all cases of honoring corpses, one must jump.
Eat for three days, bathe for three months, and practice after a period of time, so that destruction does not destroy nature, and death does not hurt life. Mourning does not exceed three years, and mourning clothes do not repair, and graves are not built; on auspicious days, white harps are played to inform the people of the end; this is a rule of moderation. From serving the father to serving the mother, and love the same. There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, no two rulers in a country, no two masters in a family, and they are all governed by one. Therefore, when the father is alive, the mother should mourn for the same period of mourning, which shows that there is no two masters.
The reason why the ancient kings ruled the world is five: valuing virtue, valuing nobility, valuing the elderly, respecting the elders, and loving the young. These five are the reason why the ancient kings ruled the world. Valuing virtue, why? Because it is close to the Tao. Valuing nobility is because it is close to the monarch. Valuing the elderly is because it is close to relatives. Respecting the elders is because it is close to brothers. Loving the young is because it is close to children. Therefore, the most filial is close to the king, and the most brotherly is close to the hegemon. The most filial is close to the king, even if it is the emperor, there must be a father; the most brotherly is close to the hegemon, even if it is a prince, there must be a brother. The teachings of the ancient kings are followed and not changed, so they can lead the world and the country. Confucius said: "To establish love from one's relatives is to teach people to be harmonious. To establish education from one's elders is to teach people to be obedient. Teach people to be kind and harmonious, and people will value being close to one's relatives; teach people to respect elders, and people will value being obedient. Filial piety to parents, obedience to orders, and this is practiced throughout the world."
At the beginning of death, he was full as if he had no end; after the funeral, he was as if he was looking for something but couldn't get it; after the burial, he was as if he was looking for something but couldn't get it. He was trained and sighed, auspicious and vast. Zhulou shot arrows at him again, probably since the battle at Shengxing. The women of Lu who wore their hair in a bun and mourned started from the defeat at the Taiyu.
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