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In ancient times, the seams of the hat were shrunk, but now, the seams are horizontal; so the hat of mourning is auspicious, which is not the ancient way. Zengzi said to Zisi: "Ji! When I was in mourning for my parents, I did not drink water for seven days." Zisi said: "The ancient kings established the rituals, those who passed by should bow down to reach it, and those who did not reach it should stand on tiptoe to reach it. Therefore, when a gentleman is in mourning for his parents, he should not drink water for three days, and he can only stand up after being caned." Zengzi said: "If small merits are not taxed, then distant brothers will never mourn, is that right?"
When Deng You first sought refuge, he abandoned his own son on the road and saved his disciples. After crossing the river, he took a concubine and loved her very much. Many years later, when I asked him about the reason, I was told that he was a northerner who had suffered from rebellion. I remembered his parents' names and found out that he was You's nephew. You had always been a virtuous man with impeccable words and deeds. When he heard about this, he felt grief and resentment for the rest of his life and never kept a concubine again.
When Wang Changshi was seriously ill, he lay under the stirrup, turned the whisk to look at him, and sighed, "A man like him will never live to be forty!" When he died, Liu Yin came to the funeral and stuck the whisk with a rhinoceros horn handle into the coffin, and was heartbroken.
Wang Youjun was good at calligraphy, as were Wang Jingren and Xu Xuandu. After the two men died, Youjun became even more successful in debates. Kong Yan warned him, saying, "Your Excellency, in the past you had close relations with Wang and Xu. But after they passed away, you did not take good care of them. This is unacceptable to the people." Youjun felt very ashamed.
According to the etiquette of eating, the meat is placed on the left and the stew is placed on the right, the food is placed on the left and the soup is placed on the right. Outside the roasted part, inside the vinegar and sauce part, at the end of the scallion part, and on the right of the wine part. For those who use preserved meat, the left side is the top and the right side is the end. If the guest descends to a lower level and holds the food to say goodbye, the host will say goodbye to the guest, and then the guest will sit down. The host invites the guests to offer a sacrifice: the sacrificial food and the sacrificial objects are presented first. Confusion of order, and offering sacrifices to all. At the third meal, the host invites the guests to eat the meat, and then they debate. If the host does not argue, the guest will not speak in vain.
When Su Jun arrived at Shitou, all the officials fled and only the attendant Zhong Ya stayed by the emperor's side. Someone said to Zhong, "Advance when you see an opportunity and retreat when you see difficulty. This is the ancient way. Your Majesty is bright and upright, so he will not be tolerated by the enemy. Why don't you take advantage of the situation instead of waiting for the consequences?" Zhong said, "I can't help the country when it is in chaos and I can't save the king when he is in danger. If we all retreat and try to save ourselves, I'm afraid Dong Hu will take the tablet and advance!"
When Xie Gong heard that Yang Sui was good, he sent his regards and asked him to come, but he refused to go. Later, Sui became a doctor of the Imperial College. He met Xie Gong on business, and Xie Gong immediately appointed him as the chief clerk.
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