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Then why is it three years? Answer: The closest relatives are separated by a period. Why is that? Answer: The heaven and earth have changed, the four seasons have changed, and everything in the heaven and earth has been renewed, so it is a symbol. Then why is it three years? Answer: It is to add more, so why double it, so it is a double period. Why is it from September to below? Answer: Why not make it less than that. Therefore, three years is a period of mourning, a small mourning is a period of mourning, and a period of nine months is a period of mourning. Take the image from the sky above, the law from the earth below, and the example from people in the middle, and the principle of human beings living together and in harmony is complete. Therefore, the three-year mourning is the most elegant of human nature, and this is called the most solemn. This is the same for all kings, and the same for ancient and modern times, but no one knows where it comes from. Confucius said: "After three years of life, one can escape from the embrace of parents; the three-year mourning is the most common mourning in the world."
When Yin Zhongkan was the governor of Jingzhou, there was a flood season and he usually ate only five bowls of food, with no other dishes. When rice grains fell on the plate or table, he would pick them up and eat them. Although we want to lead things, we must do so according to their true nature. I always tell my children, "Don't think that I am giving up my former ambitions because I have been appointed to a provincial post. It is not easy for me to be in this position now. Poverty is the norm for scholars. How can I climb the branch and abandon my roots? You should save it!"
If jade is not polished, it will not become a tool; if people do not learn, they will not know. Therefore, the ancient kings who established the country and ruled the people put teaching first. "The Book of Changes" says: "Remember the beginning and the end and learn." Is this what it means!
The destiny of heaven is called nature, following nature is called the way, and cultivating the way is called teaching. The way cannot be separated for a moment, and it is not the way if it can be separated. Therefore, the gentleman is cautious about what he does not see and fearful of what he does not hear. Nothing is more hidden than the hidden, and nothing is more obvious than the subtle, so the gentleman is cautious when he is alone. When joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness are not expressed, it is called the middle; when they are expressed in moderation, it is called harmony; the middle is the great foundation of the world; harmony is the way of the world. When the middle and harmony are achieved, heaven and earth are in their proper places, and all things are nurtured.
Yu Daoji said: "Although Lian Po and Lin Xiangru have been dead for thousands of years, they are still alive. Although Cao Tu and Li Zhi are still alive, they are as sad as the dead in the underworld. If everyone is like this, they can be ruled by tying ropes, but I am afraid that foxes and raccoons will eat them all."
It is the festival of a boy. The black cloth clothes are brocade-edged, the brocade belt, and the button brocade, and the hair is all red brocade. Boys do not wear fur or silk, shoes or silk, and do not wear mourning clothes. Listening to affairs does not require hemp. If there is no business, he will stand to the north of the host and see the teacher enter with others. Those who serve food to the teacher with different titles will offer sacrifices later and eat first. When the guest offers sacrifices, the host declines and says, "It is not enough to offer sacrifices." When the guest eats, the host declines with a sparse. If the host prepares his own sauce, the guest will clean it himself. In a room, one person who is not a guest should clean up. In a meal, one person should clean up. In banquets, women should not clean up. When eating dates, peaches, and plums, do not take the core. When offering melons, throw away the rings in the middle of the food. Those who eat fruits should eat after the gentlemen, and those who light the fire should eat before the gentlemen. In celebrations, do not congratulate unless the king gives gifts. Confucius ate at Ji's house, and did not refuse. He did not eat meat and ate.
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