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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
The Duke said, 鈥淲hy don鈥檛 gentlemen today practice this?鈥 Confucius said, 鈥淕entlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.鈥
Li Pingyang, a son of Qinzhou, was a famous scholar in China. At that time, he was compared to Wang Yifu. Sun Xiuchu wanted to establish his authority, but Xian said, "Le Ling is popular among the people and should not be killed. Those who reduce Li Zhong do not deserve to be killed either." So he forced Zhong to commit suicide. At first, Chong was at home, and someone walked in through the door and took out a piece of paper from his bun to show Chong. He was aroused when he saw her again, so he went inside to show her to his daughter, who exclaimed "wonderful". When you understand his intention, you can commit suicide when you leave. This woman is very wise, and I always consult her.
When Shi Chong went to his toilet, there were always more than ten maids serving him, all of them dressed in beautiful clothes. There is everything available, including Jiajian powder, agarwood juice, etc. He also gave the guests new clothes and chopsticks and asked them to go out, and many of the guests were so embarrassed that they could not even go to the toilet. General Wang went there, took off his old clothes, put on new ones, and looked proud. The maids said to each other, "This guest will surely become a thief."
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