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When Wen Bo died, Jing Jiang sat on his bed without crying, saying, "In the past, I had Si Zi, and I thought he would be a wise man, so I never went to the public office; now when he died, none of my friends and ministers shed tears, but the women in the house all cried loudly. Si Zi must have been very unruly!" When Ji Kangzi's mother died, he laid out his underwear. Jing Jiang said, "A woman who does not wear clothes dare not meet her parents-in-law. There will be guests from all over the world coming. Why should she display her underwear here?" She ordered to remove it.
Officials do not borrow sacrificial utensils. Before sacrificial utensils are made, banquet utensils are not made.
Ziyun: "Rites are used to clarify doubts and distinguish subtle things, which are used to censor the people. "Therefore, the noble and the humble have different levels, clothes are different, and there are positions in the court, so the people will give way to each other. Confucius said: "There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, no two masters in the family, and no two superiors. This shows the people that there is a difference between the monarch and the minister." The Spring and Autumn Annals does not refer to the funeral of the king of Chu and Yue, the ritual king does not refer to the sky, and the officials do not refer to the monarch, fearing that the people will be confused. The Book of Songs says: "Why don't we meet each other in the morning? I am still worried about it." Confucius said: "The king does not ride in the same car with people of the same surname, and ride in the same car with people of different surnames but wear different clothes, showing that the people do not dislike it." In this way, the people can still kill their monarch with the same surname.
When Zi Liu's mother died, Zi Shuo asked for a feast. Zi Liu asked, "Why?" Zi Shuo said, "Please give porridge to my half brother's mother." Zi Liu said, "How can you bury your mother with porridge for someone else's mother? No." After the funeral, Zi Shuo wanted to use the remaining cloth to prepare the sacrificial utensils. Zi Liu said, "No, I have heard that a gentleman should not stay at home during a funeral. Please arrange for the poor among your brothers." The gentleman said, "If you plan for someone's military advisor, you will die; if you plan for someone's state, you will be destroyed." Gongshu Wenzi ascended to Xiaqiu, and Qu Boyu followed him. Wenzi said, "How happy this hill is. I want to be buried there when I die." Qu Boyu said, "If you are happy, then Yuan will come forward."
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
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