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Taishu Guang was very eloquent, and Zhi Zhongzhi was good at calligraphy, and both of them became ministers. Whenever he sat down with the Duke, they would talk extensively, but Zhongzhi could not respond. It is difficult to express my thoughts broadly if I retreat, and I cannot answer if I express my thoughts broadly.
In the case of parents' funeral, after the funeral, people cry, and the pillars, lintels and screens are cut, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; after a period of time, a small funeral is held, people live in a whitened room, and sleep on mats; after another period of time, a big funeral is held, people live and sleep again; in the middle of the month, people mourn, and use a bed.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Wang Xu often slandered Yin Jingzhou to Wang Guobao, and Yin was very worried about it and sought advice from Wang Dongting. He said, "You just need to visit Wang Xu several times, and when you go there, send everyone away and discuss other matters. In this way, the friendship between the two kings will be broken." Yin followed his advice. When Guo Bao saw Wang Xu, he asked, "What did you talk about with Zhongkan in private?" Xu said, "We always keep in touch with each other and have nothing else to discuss." Guo Bao believed that Xu was hiding something from him, and indeed their friendship became less and less, and the slander stopped.
Emperor Wu of Wei once passed by the Cao'e stele, and Yang Xiu followed him. On the back of the stele there was an inscription of eight characters: "young woman with yellow silk, grandson Jue". Wei Wu asked Xiu, "Do you understand it?" Xiu replied, "I understand." Wei Wu said, "You can't tell me yet. Let me think about it." After walking for thirty miles, Wei Wu said, "I have figured it out." He asked Xiu to write down what he had learned. Xiu said: "Yellow silk is colored silk, and the word for it is absolutely perfect. Young woman is a young girl, and the word for it is wonderful. Grandson is a girl, and the word for it is good. Juejiu is suffering, and the word for it is words. This is what is called 'absolutely wonderful and good words'." Wei Wu also memorized it, and he agreed with Xiu, so he sighed and said: "I am not as talented as you, and I feel thirty miles behind."
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