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During the time of Lord Xie, many soldiers fled and most of them escaped to Nantang and boarded the boats. Some people wanted to search for them at a certain time, but Xie Gong refused, saying, "If we don't allow these people to stay, how can we build a capital city?"
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
General Yu was in Luoyang and questioned Zhonglang. Zhonglang Liuzhi said, "You all should come." Soon Wen Yuanfu, Liu Wangqiao and Pei Shuze all arrived, and they chatted all day long. Mr. Yu still remembered the talents of Liu and Pei, and the integrity of Yuanfu.
When the senior officials meet the king, the king shall bow to him. When the scholars meet the senior officials, the senior officials shall bow to him. When the same country meets for the first time, the host shall bow to him. The king shall not return the bow to the scholars; if they are not his subjects, they shall return the bow. The ministers, even if they are lowly, must return the greetings.
Emperor Xiaowu held a meeting in the West Hall, and Fu Tao sat down in advance. When he got off the car, he called his son and said to him, "In a gathering of hundreds of people, before sitting down, he asked, 'Where is Fu Tao? Is he here?' This is why it is not easy to answer. How is it to be a father like this?"
When Taifu Xie was lingering in Dongshan, he went sailing on the sea with Sun Xinggong and others. The wind was blowing and the waves were surging. Sun, Wang and others were all shocked and ordered their men to return. The Taifu had a solemn look on his face, chanting and whistling without saying a word. The boatman thought the gentleman looked relaxed, but he still kept going. The wind suddenly turned strong and the waves became fierce; everyone was noisy and could not sit still. Gong Xuyun said: "If this continues, there will be no way back!" Everyone immediately responded and went back. Therefore, he was judged to be capable of maintaining peace in the government and the country.
The great officials of various countries, when entering the emperor's country, call themselves the so-and-so scholar; they call themselves the accompanying minister so-and-so. They call themselves the son outside, and the old man of the widowed monarch in their own country. The envoy calls himself so-and-so. The emperor does not speak out, and the princes do not give names.
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