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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Chen Ying was from Dongyang. He cultivated moral conduct at a young age and was well-known among his fellow villagers. At the end of the Qin Dynasty, when chaos broke out, the people of Dongyang wanted to take Ying as their master, but his mother said, "No! As your wife, I have rarely seen poverty and humbleness. Once I become rich and noble, it will be unlucky! It is better to take the army and make it yours: if it succeeds, you will get less benefit; if it fails, you will suffer the consequences."
Sun Xinggong said: "Pan's writing is like a piece of brocade, and everything is good; Lu's writing is like separating gold from sand, and treasures are often found."
Wang Shao and Wang Hui went to Xuanwu together, just when Yu Xi's family was being arrested. Hui felt uneasy and wanted to leave hesitantly; Shao sat still, waiting to receive the letter, and then left without making any progress. Commentators believe Shao is superior.
When Sun Chuo first wrote Fu Suichu, he built a house by the ditches and rivers, and said that he saw the point of stopping only when he was satisfied. There is a pine tree planted in front of the room, why do I need to dam it myself? Gao Shiyuan was also a neighbor at the time. He said to Sun: "The pine tree is indeed lovely, but it will never be of any use as a pillar of support." Sun said: "Even if the maple and willow trees can be hugged, what good are they?"
Liu Yin said to Xie Renzu, "Since I had four friends, my disciples have become closer." He said to Xu Xuandu, "Since I have my reasons, no bad words will reach my ears." Both of them accepted it without resentment.
Zi SiWhen his mother died in Wei, Liu Ruo said to Zisi: "You are the descendant of a sage. People from all over the world come to you to observe the rites. You should be careful." Zisi said: "Why should I be careful? I heard that if there is the rite but not the money, a gentleman will not do it; if there is the rite and the money but not the time, a gentleman will not do it. Why should I be careful!"
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