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Yu Daoji said: "Although Lian Po and Lin Xiangru have been dead for thousands of years, they are still alive. Although Cao Tu and Li Zhi are still alive, they are as sad as the dead in the underworld. If everyone is like this, they can be ruled by tying ropes, but I am afraid that foxes and raccoons will eat them all."
In mourning of parents, after the funeral, one should cry for the deceased, eat simple food and drink water, and not eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the minor auspiciousness, one should eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the major auspiciousness, one should eat soy sauce; in the middle of the month, one should mourn, and drink sweet wine during the mourning. Those who start drinking should drink sweet wine first. Those who start eating meat should eat dried meat first. In the case of parents' funeral, people live in a lean-to house, sleep on straw and a block of pillow, and do not wear mourning clothes; in the case of mourning of the first mourning period, people live in a whitened room, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; in the case of mourning of the second mourning period, people sleep on mats, and in the case of mourning of the third mourning period, people wear hemp and a bed. This is the way that grief is expressed in the place where one lives.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
After Ren Kai lost his power, he no longer disciplined himself. Someone asked He Qiao, "Why did you sit by and watch Yuan Pei fail without helping?" He said, "Yuan Pei is like Beixia Gate, which is about to fall apart. It cannot be supported by a single piece of wood."
Emperor Ming of Wei built a house for his grandmother at the Zhen family. After it was completed, he went to inspect it and asked his attendants, "What should we name the pavilion?" The attendant Miao Xi said, "Your Majesty is as wise as the wise king; and more virtuous than Zeng and Min. The establishment of this pavilion is a tribute to your uncle, so it should be named 'Weiyang'."
Emperor Ming of Wei built a house for his grandmother at the Zhen family. After it was completed, he went to inspect it and asked his attendants, "What should we name the pavilion?" The attendant Miao Xi said, "Your Majesty is as wise as the wise king; and more virtuous than Zeng and Min. The establishment of this pavilion is a tribute to your uncle, so it should be named 'Weiyang'."
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