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When the Grand Tutor, Prince Donghai, was stationed in Xuchang, he appointed Wang Anqi as the secretary and military officer, and they had a good relationship and respected each other. He ordered the Crown Prince Pi, saying, "The benefits of learning are shallow, while the comfort of the body is profound. It is better to observe the etiquette and manners carefully than to practice them casually. It is better to receive the emperor's will in person than to savor his words. General Wang is the model of human relations, you should learn from him!" Someone said, "General Wang, Zhao and Deng are the models of human relations, you should learn from them!" He was referring to Anqi, Deng Bodao and Zhao Mu. Yuan Hong wrote the Biography of Famous Scholars and mentioned Wang Canjun. Some say that the Zhao family still has this copy.
Wang Han was the governor of Lujiang County, and he was corrupt and shameless. Wang Dun protected his brother, so he said in front of everyone: "My brother was a good ruler in the county, and people in Lujiang all praised him!" At that time, He Chong was Dun's chief clerk, and he was also present. He said in a serious tone: "Chong is from Lujiang, and what he heard is different from this!" Dun remained silent. Others were tormented by his actions, but he was calm and composed.
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
Ji Kang was seven feet and eight inches tall, with a very handsome appearance. Someone who saw it exclaimed, "It was solemn and clear, refreshing and clear." Someone else said, "It was solemn and clear, like the wind under a pine tree, high and slow." Shan Gong said, "Ji Shuye was a man who was as independent as a solitary pine tree; when he was drunk, he was like a jade mountain about to collapse."
Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
Wang Pingzi, Hu Wuyanguo and others all regarded letting go as a sign of being generous, and some even went naked. Yue Guang laughed and said, "There is a place of happiness in the orthodox teachings. Why do you have to do this?"
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