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Establishing power and measurement, examining articles, changing the calendar, changing the color of clothes, distinguishing emblems, different tools, and different clothes, these are what he obtains and changes with the people. There are some things that cannot be changed: loving one's relatives, respecting the elders, and distinguishing between men and women. These are things that cannot be changed with the people.
In the court, talk about etiquette, and answer with etiquette when asked about etiquette. At the grand feast, do not ask for divination, and do not be extravagant.
Grand Tutor Xie asked his sons and nephews, "Why do you want to make them good when you are involved in other people's affairs?" No one said anything. The charioteer answered, "It's like wanting orchids and jade trees to grow in the courtyard."
The people of Wei believed that turtles were knowledgeable. Chen Ziche died in Wei. His wife and her family's senior officials planned to bury him alive with her. After the plan was finalized, Chen Zikang arrived and told her, "My master is ill and there is no one to take care of him. Please bury him alive with me." Zikang said, "Burying him alive with me is not a courtesy. Even if I do, who should take care of him like my wife and the prime minister? If I have to, I will do it. If I have to, I will let my two sons do it." So he did not do it.
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