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In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
When Prime Minister Wang visited Yangzhou, he was greeted by hundreds of guests, all of whom had a favorable look on their faces. There were only a guest named Ren from Linhai and several Hu people with whom he had not yet gotten along. The Duke therefore went to Ren's border and said, "If you leave, there will be no one left in Linhai." Ren was overjoyed. As he passed by a Hu people, he snapped his fingers and said, "Lanjie, Lanjie." All the Hu people laughed, and everyone sitting there was happy.
At the funeral of Sikou Huizi, Ziyou prepared hemp mourning clothes and hemp sash for him. Wen Zi declined, saying, "You are insulted to be with Mi Mou's brother You, and you are insulted to wear clothes for him. How dare you decline?" Ziyou said, "It is the rite." Wen Zi retreated and cried again. Ziyou hurried to the seats of the ministers. Wen Zi declined again, saying, "You are insulted to be with Mi Mou's brother You, and you are insulted to wear clothes for him, and you are insulted to attend his funeral. How dare you decline?" Ziyou said, "I insist on asking." Wen Zi retreated, helped Shi Zi to stand facing south, and said, "You are insulted to be with Mi Mou's brother You, and you are insulted to wear clothes for him, and you are insulted to attend his funeral. How dare you not return to your position?" Ziyou hurried to the guest seat. At the funeral of General Wenzi, after the mourning period was over, the people of Yue came to offer their condolences. The host wore a deep robe and a white cap, waited in the temple, weeping. Ziyou looked at him and said, "General Wen's son is almost a commoner! He is a man of honor who died according to the etiquette, and his actions are in the right place."
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
All the rituals for offering sacrifices to the ancestral temple: cattle are called Yiyuan Dawu, pigs are called Ganglie, pigs are called 腯肥, sheep are called Roumao, chickens are called Hanyin, dogs are called Gengxian, pheasants are called Shuzhi, rabbits are called Mingshi, dried meat is called Yinji, dried fish is called Shangji, fresh fish is called Xianji, water is called Qingdi, wine is called Qingzhuo, millet is called Xianghe, sorghum is called Xiangqi, millet is called Mingji, rice is called Jiashu, leek is called Fengben, salt is called Xianyan, jade is called Jiayu, and currency is called Liangbi.
The great officials of various countries, when entering the emperor's country, call themselves the so-and-so scholar; they call themselves the accompanying minister so-and-so. They call themselves the son outside, and the old man of the widowed monarch in their own country. The envoy calls himself so-and-so. The emperor does not speak out, and the princes do not give names.
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