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When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
Zengzi went to Fuxia to pay tribute to his ancestors. After the host filled the pond, he pushed the coffin back and brought it back. He brought down the women and then performed the rituals. The attendant asked, "Is it the etiquette?" Zengzi said, "The ancestor is Qie; Qie, why can't he stay overnight?" The attendant asked Ziyou again, "Is it the etiquette?" Ziyou said, "Eat under the window, bury the dead in a small way inside the door, bury the dead in a big way on the east side, and hold the funeral in the guest seat. The funeral is held in the courtyard and buried in the tomb. This is how it is far away. Therefore, funerals have progress but no retreat." Zengzi heard this and said, "It's too much. I'm the one who left the ancestor." Zengzi wore a fur coat to pay his respects, and Ziyou wore a fur coat to pay his respects. Zengzi pointed at Ziyou and showed him, "Fuck, you are a man who is accustomed to etiquette, how can you wear a fur coat to pay your respects?" The host had folded his hair in a small way, bared his clothes, and tied his hair; Ziyou hurried out and came back wearing a fur coat and a sash. Zengzi said, "I went too far, I went too far, this is it."
The king, Liu and Duke Huan went to Fuzhou Mountain to watch. After drinking, Liu put his feet on Duke Huan's neck. Duke Huan could not bear it any more and pushed it away with his hand. After returning, Wang Changshi said to Liu: "Can he be compared to others?"
Lady Wang Jiangzhou said to Xie E, "Why don't you make any progress? It's because you are so preoccupied with worldly affairs that your talent is limited."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Man Fen is afraid of the wind. When Emperor Wu of Jin was sitting, there was a glazed screen in the north window, which looked dense but sparse, and he looked excited and embarrassed. The emperor laughed at him. Fen replied: "I am like a cow from Wu, panting when I see the moon."
Those who follow others in mourning should not mourn until their parents are gone. Those who follow others should mourn even when their parents are dead. If a concubine leaves a female ruler, she should not mourn for the female ruler's son. According to etiquette, there is no sacrifice without the king. The crown prince does not lower his wife's parents; his wife is the same as the son of a senior official. If the father is a scholar and the son is the emperor or a prince, then sacrifices are made to the emperor or a prince, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If the father is the emperor or a prince and the son is a scholar, sacrifices are made to the scholar, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If a woman leaves the house when she is in mourning, she should be removed. If she leaves the house before mourning for her parents, she should be mourned for three years. If she leaves the house after mourning, it is over. If she returns without mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time; if she returns after mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time.
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