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Zengzi said: "The filial son provides for the elderly by making his heart happy and not violating his will, making his ears and eyes happy, making his bed comfortable, and providing him with food and drink. The filial son who is loyal to the parents provides for the whole life. The whole life is not the whole life of the parents, but the whole life of the parents. Therefore, the parents also love what they love and respect what they respect. This is true even for dogs and horses, let alone humans!" Regarding the provision of elderly care, the Five Emperors had regulations and the Three Kings had requests for advice. The Five Emperors followed the rule of nurturing the spirit and not asking for advice. If they did something good, they would record it as a dunshi. The Three Kings also followed the rule of nurturing the elderly and then asking for advice. They also did not follow the etiquette and all had dunshi.
The king is the emperor for three years, and his wife is like the king of the outer clan. The crown prince does not wear the clothes for the emperor. The king's wife, the wife, and the eldest son's wife. The son of the senior official who is the king, the wife, and the eldest son should wear the clothes of the scholar.
Huan Xuan went to Yin in Jingzhou. Yin was sleeping during the day in his concubine's room, and his attendants refused to see him. When Queen Huan mentioned this, Yin said, "I didn't sleep at first. Even if there was this, wouldn't it be 'the virtuous can change the color'?"
Liu Zhenchang talked with Yin Yuanyuan. Liu Li was a little defeated. Yin said, "Oh, you don't want to be a general who is good at attacking from above with ladders."
When Cai Situ crossed the river and saw Peng Xie, he was overjoyed and said, "Crabs have eight legs and two claws." He ordered them to be cooked. After eating, I vomited and felt exhausted, then I realized it was not crab. Later, he told Xie Renzu about this, and Xie said, "You are not familiar with Erya, and you almost died because of my persuasion to study."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When Kong Wenju was ten years old, he went to Luo with his father. At that time, Li Yuanli was famous and served as the Inspector of the Capital Region. Only those with outstanding talents and reputation, as well as those who were his cousins, were allowed to visit him. When Wen Ju arrived at the gate, he said to the clerk, "I am the relative of Lord Li." After being let in, he sat down in front. Yuanli asked, "What is the relationship between you and me?" He replied, "In the past, my ancestor Confucius and your ancestor Boyang had a teacher-student relationship. So you and I have been friends for generations." Yuanli and the guests were all surprised. When Taizhong Daifu Chen Wei arrived later, people told him the same words. Wei said, “A child who is very smart when he is young may not be a good person when he grows up!” Wen Ju said, “I think you must have been very smart when you were young!” Wei was very embarrassed.
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