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When Deng You first sought refuge, he abandoned his own son on the road and saved his disciples. After crossing the river, he took a concubine and loved her very much. Many years later, when I asked him about the reason, I was told that he was a northerner who had suffered from rebellion. I remembered his parents' names and found out that he was You's nephew. You had always been a virtuous man with impeccable words and deeds. When he heard about this, he felt grief and resentment for the rest of his life and never kept a concubine again.
Yang Chen is a very loyal and steadfast person. When Zhao Wanglun was the prime minister, Chen was the chief secretary of the Grand Tutor, and was appointed to participate in the prime minister's military affairs. When the envoy finally arrived, Chen was deeply afraid of the disaster in Yu, so he had no time to get on his horse, so he rode away. The envoy chased him. Chen was a good archer and shot arrows left and right. The envoy did not dare to move forward and thus escaped.
He Yan and Deng Yang asked Guan Lu to make a hexagram, saying: "I wonder if the position will reach Three Dukes?" After the hexagram was made, Lu quoted the ancient meaning and took it as a deep warning. Yang said, "This is what old people always say." Yan said, "How amazing! The ancients thought it was difficult. Today, people think it is difficult to be sincere in communication. Now you have achieved two difficult things at the same time. You can be called 'the bright virtue is fragrant'. Doesn't the poem say, 'Hide it in your heart, how can you forget it?'"
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
Therefore, if male education is not cultivated, yang affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the sun is eclipsed; if female obedience is not cultivated, yin affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the moon is eclipsed. Therefore, when the sun is eclipsed, the emperor wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six officials, and eliminates the yang affairs of the world; when the moon is eclipsed, the queen wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six palaces, and eliminates the yin affairs of the world. Therefore, the emperor and the queen are like the sun and the moon, the yin and the yang, and they need each other to succeed. The emperor cultivates male education, which is the father's way; the queen cultivates female obedience, which is the mother's way. Therefore, it is said that the relationship between the emperor and the empress is like that between a father and his mother. Therefore, to wear mourning clothes for the emperor is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the father; to wear mourning clothes for the empress is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the mother.
When serving food to elders, if the host serves the food personally, then one should bow before eating; if the host does not serve the food personally, then one should eat without bowing.
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