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For the funeral of a king: for three days, sons and wives use sticks, and after the funeral on the fifth day, the grand officials and their wives are given sticks. Sons and grand officials use sticks outside the bedroom door, and they are gathered inside the bedroom door; the wives and their wives are next and use sticks, and when he ascends the throne, he has someone hold them. Sons take off their sticks when they have the king's order, and gather their sticks when they have the king's order, and take off their sticks when they listen to divination and have something to do with the corpse. Grand officials gather their sticks when they are at the king's place, and they use sticks when they are at the grand officials' place. For the funeral of a grand official: after the funeral on the third day, the master, the master's wife, and the old man in the house all use sticks. Grand officials take off their sticks when they have the king's order, and gather their sticks when they have the order of the grand officials; the wife takes off her stick when she has the order of her wife, and she is given a stick when she has the order of her wife. For the funeral of a scholar: for two days, the funeral is held, and for three days, the master takes off his stick, and the wives all use sticks. For the king's order and the wife's order, the order is the same as for the grand officials, and for the grand officials and their wives' order, the order is the same as for the grand officials. Sons all use sticks, and they don't ascend the throne. When a senior official or scholar mourns a funeral, he uses a staff; when mourning over a coffin, he uses a staff. If he discards a staff, he breaks it and throws it to the hermit.
Then why is it three years? Answer: The closest relatives are separated by a period. Why is that? Answer: The heaven and earth have changed, the four seasons have changed, and everything in the heaven and earth has been renewed, so it is a symbol. Then why is it three years? Answer: It is to add more, so why double it, so it is a double period. Why is it from September to below? Answer: Why not make it less than that. Therefore, three years is a period of mourning, a small mourning is a period of mourning, and a period of nine months is a period of mourning. Take the image from the sky above, the law from the earth below, and the example from people in the middle, and the principle of human beings living together and in harmony is complete. Therefore, the three-year mourning is the most elegant of human nature, and this is called the most solemn. This is the same for all kings, and the same for ancient and modern times, but no one knows where it comes from. Confucius said: "After three years of life, one can escape from the embrace of parents; the three-year mourning is the most common mourning in the world."
A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
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