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When Gu Rong was in Luoyang, he once accepted someone's invitation. He noticed that the person who was roasting meat wanted to be roasted too, so he stopped what he was doing. Those sitting together laughed at him. Rong said, "How can one hold it all day long and not know its taste?" Later, when he encountered chaos and had to cross the river, every time he was in danger, there was always one person by his side. When he asked him why, he found out that he was the one who was being burned.
The Buddhist scriptures believe that by cultivating the spirit, one can become a sage. Jian Wen said: "I don't know if I can reach the pinnacle of achievement. However, the merits of training cannot be denied."
Xu Yuan once visited Jianwen. It was a windy and calm night with a bright moon, so they composed music and talked in the room. Expressing one鈥檚 inner thoughts is Xu鈥檚 forte. The words are clear and graceful, more than usual. Although Jianwen and he had always been in sync, this encounter was even more regrettable. Unconsciously they knelt down and spoke with their hands, and the conversation lasted until almost dawn. Then he said: "Xuan Du has great talent and sentiment, so it is not easy to give him many compliments."
In this month, take care of the elderly, give them a stick, and eat porridge. He ordered the clothing department to make sure that clothes were embroidered with regular patterns, with different sizes and lengths. Clothes had to be measured and must be made according to their origins, and hats and belts had to be worn regularly. He ordered the officials to enforce strict punishments and to execute people appropriately without any irregularities. If they were irregularities, they would suffer the consequences.
The lowly should not mourn the noble, the young should not mourn the old, this is the etiquette. Only the emperor should be mourned by calling the heaven. The princes mourning each other is not etiquette.
The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
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