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When Yuan Yanbo was a minister of the Ministry of Personnel, Zijing wrote to Xi Jiabin: "Yanbo has come in, which is enough to revive my spirit. Therefore, I know that it is difficult for me to beat him, and I hope that he will be rejected a little and then he will be promoted again."
Wang Dongting was the chief clerk of Xuanwu. One spring day, he and his brothers Shitou rode on horseback to the suburbs. Shi Yan and his fellow travelers marched together. Only one person from Dongting was always in front, and he could sense it several dozen steps away, but no one could understand it. Shitou and others were tired, and soon the imperial carriage returned. Everyone seemed to be an official, except Dongting Yiyi who was standing in front. His understanding is so quick.
Xi Chao dealt with Fu Yuan, and Yuan saw that his two sons had their hair tied together. Chao observed it for a long time and said to Yuan, "The younger one is more talented and famous, but the one who can protect your family will ultimately depend on your brother." These are Fu Liang's brothers.
After crying, taboos are used. In etiquette, do not taboo names that are disliked. Two names are not tabooed. If you are in the service of your parents, you should taboo the king's parents; if you are not in the service of your parents, you should not taboo the king's parents. The king has no private taboos, and the nobles have public taboos. There is no taboo in the "Book of Songs" and "Book of Documents", and there is no taboo in writing. There is no taboo in the temple. The taboos of wives, even in front of the king, are not taboos; women do not taboo when leaving home. There is no taboo for major or minor merits. Ask about the prohibitions when entering the country, ask about the customs when entering the country, and ask about the taboos when entering the door.
A guest once asked Chen Jifang, "What merits and virtues did your lord Taiqiu have to deserve such high reputation?" Jifang replied, "My lord is like a laurel tree growing on the edge of Mount Tai, which is ten thousand feet high and unfathomably deep. It is moistened by the sweet dew above and moistened by the deep spring below. At that time, how could the laurel tree know the height of Mount Tai and the depth of the deep spring? It didn't know whether it had merits or not!"
When Taifu Xie had not yet come of age and had just left for the west, he went to see Changshi Wang and had a long and clear conversation with him. After he left, Gou Zi asked, "How respectful is Xiangke?" The chief secretary said, "Xiangke is so noisy that he is coming to force people."
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
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