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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Wen Taizhen was not yet in a high position, she often played Chupu with appraisers from Yangzhou and Huaizhong, and she never competed with them. Once he made a mistake, he lost a lot of things and was humiliated, with no way to return. He was on good terms with Yu Liang, and shouted to Liang in the boat, "Can you redeem me?" Yu immediately sent him money, and he was able to return. After these four.
Wang Han was the governor of Lujiang County, and he was corrupt and shameless. Wang Dun protected his brother, so he said in front of everyone: "My brother was a good ruler in the county, and people in Lujiang all praised him!" At that time, He Chong was Dun's chief clerk, and he was also present. He said in a serious tone: "Chong is from Lujiang, and what he heard is different from this!" Dun remained silent. Others were tormented by his actions, but he was calm and composed.
When Emperor Yuan was in a meeting, he called Prime Minister Wang to sit on the imperial bed. Prime Minister Wang refused firmly, and Emperor Zhongzong made it even more painful for him to do so. The prince said: "If the sun were to shine with all things, how could the ministers look up to it?"
He Yan was the Minister of Personnel and held a prestigious position. His room was always filled with guests for conversation. Wang Bi, who was not yet twenty years old, went to see him. Yan heard of Bi's name, so he cited the superior theory of the previous one and said to Bi: "I think this theory is the best, can you challenge it again?" Bi then challenged, and everyone in the room thought he was inferior. So Bi acted as the host and the guest several times, but each time he was better than others.
Duke Huan asked Kong Xiyang, "How is Anshi compared to Zhongwen?" Kong Xiyang did not answer, but asked the Duke, "How?" He replied, "Anshi is superior because no one can surpass him, so he is superior."
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