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Xi Jiabin admired the Buddhist and Taoist An Dewen, and gave him a thousand hu of rice and wrote him letters with piles of paper, expressing his sincere intentions. Daoan answered directly: "It will waste rice." He felt even more annoyed by having to wait for it.
Xi Sikong was in the Northern Palace, and Huan Xuanwu disliked him for holding military power. Xi was always in the dark about the situation, so he sent a letter to Huan: "I want to help the royal family and repair the gardens and tombs." The crown prince Jiabin was on a journey. When he heard the letter on the road, he hurriedly took the letter, read it, and found it was torn into pieces, so he returned. He also wrote a letter, explaining that he was old and sick, and could not bear the idleness of others, so he wanted to ask for some vacant land to support himself. Xuanwu was overjoyed when he received the letter, and immediately ordered the transfer of the Duke to supervise five counties and be the prefect of Kuaiji.
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
When Wang Zijing and his brothers met Duke Xi, they tiptoed to ask for his advice and were very polite to outsiders. When the guests died, they all wore chopsticks and high sandals, and had a disrespectful demeanor. When they were ordered to sit down, they all said, "We are busy and have no time to sit down." After they left, Xi Gong said with deep emotion, "If the distinguished guests were still alive, how dare you rats do this!"
Xun Jubo saw his friend sick from afar, when the Hu bandits attacked the county, his friend said to Jubo, "I am dying now, you can go!" Jubo said, "I came from afar to see you, and you asked me to go. It is not the way for Xun Jubo to destroy righteousness to save life?" When the bandits arrived, they said to Jubo, "The army is here, and the whole county is empty. Who are you, a man, and how dare you stay alone?" Jubo said, "My friend is sick, and I cannot bear to leave him. I would rather die with my own body." The bandits said to each other, "We are unrighteous people, and we have entered a righteous country!" So they organized the army and returned, and the whole county was saved.
A gentleman practices etiquette and does not seek to change customs. The rituals of sacrifice, mourning clothes, and crying positions are all the same as those of his country. He should carefully revise the laws and implement them carefully. After leaving the country for three generations, the title and salary are listed in the court, and there is an imperial edict to the country when entering and leaving. If brothers and clansmen are still alive, they should report to the clan queen; after leaving the country for three generations, the title and salary are not listed in the court, and there is no imperial edict to the country when entering and leaving. Only on the day of the new country, the law of the new country should be followed. A gentleman does not change his name after he is orphaned. If he becomes noble after being orphaned, he does not give his father a posthumous title. In mourning, before the burial, read the funeral ceremony; after the burial, read the sacrificial ceremony; after the mourning, read the music.
For a man who is a son, the three gifts are not as great as a carriage and horses. Therefore, his neighbors praised him for his filial piety, his brothers and relatives praised him for his kindness, his colleagues praised him for his brotherly love, his friends praised him for his benevolence, and his acquaintances praised him for his trustworthiness. Seeing my father鈥檚 insistence, I dare not advance unless I am told to, I dare not retreat unless I am told to, and I dare not answer unless I am asked. This is the behavior of a filial son.
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