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When there is a funeral, if you hear of the funeral of a distant brother, you must go even if you are in mourning; if you are not a brother, you will not go even if you are a neighbor. All the brothers who do not live together will pay their respects. The emperor's coffin has four layers; the water rhinoceros leather coffin is covered with it, which is three inches thick, one 杷 coffin, two 杷 coffins, and all four are round. The coffin is tied with two 杷 three, and each 衛 is tied with one. The coffin of the uncle is six feet long at the end.
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
The king does not take away the jade without a reason; the ministers do not hang the zither without a reason, and the scholars do not play the zither without a reason. If the scholars have made offerings to the king, the king will ask him the next day, "Where did you take it?" He will bow twice and then answer.
Jian Wen said to Wang Huaizu: "You are not very talented, but you are not indifferent to fame and wealth; just a little bit of sincerity and honesty is enough to show a lot to others."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Huan Xuanwu ordered Yuan Yanbo to compose the Northern Expedition Fu. After it was completed, the Duke and other wise men of the time read it together, and they all sighed with admiration for it. Wang Xun was sitting there at the time and said, "I regret that there is one sentence missing. If the word 'write' had enough rhyme, it would have been better." Yuan immediately took up his pen and said, "My feelings are endless, and I write alone to follow the flow of the style." The Duke said to Wang, "The people today have to praise Yuan for this."
Wang Da and Wang Gong once sat together with He Pushe. Gong was the prefect of Danyang at that time, and Dashi was the governor of Jingzhou. When the conversation was about to end, he urged everyone to drink a lot. Gong refused to drink, so Da forced him to drink. It became more and more painful, so they each tied their hands with their skirts. There were nearly a thousand people in Gong's mansion, and they were all called into the room. Although there were few left and right guards, they were also ordered to move forward, intending to kill each other. There was no plan for shooting, so they stood up and sat down in a row between two people, and then they were able to disperse. The ancients were ashamed of the so-called snobbish friendship.
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