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Zeng Zi asked: "Do you mourn for three years?" Confucius said: "In the three-year mourning, you should be dressed, not stand in a group, and do not travel. Gentlemen use etiquette to embellish their feelings. If you mourn for three years, isn't it empty?" Zeng Zi asked: "The officials and scholars can get rid of their private mourning, but they have the monarch's mourning clothes. How can they get rid of it?" Confucius said: "If you have the monarch's mourning clothes on your body, you dare not wear them privately. How can you get rid of them? So it is not removed after the time has passed. In the case of the king's mourning, mourning is removed before offering sacrifices, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "Is it okay not to remove mourning for parents?" Confucius said, "The ancient kings established rituals, and did not perform them after the time has passed, which is a ritual; it is not that they cannot do it, but they are worried that it is too much. Therefore, a gentleman does not offer sacrifices after the time has passed, which is a ritual. Zengzi asked, "When the king dies, after the funeral, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Return home and live at home. If there are important things, go to the king's place and see him off morning and evening." He said, "After the king has been buried, if the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off." He said, "If the king has not buried his parents, and the minister has parents in mourning, what should I do?" Confucius said, "Go home and cry and come back to see the king off. If there are important things, go back and see him off morning and evening. For officials, the old man in the house will perform the ritual; for scholars, the descendants will perform the ritual. The wife of a great official, if there is a serious matter, should also go to the king's place, morning and night. "
In the court, talk about etiquette, and answer with etiquette when asked about etiquette. At the grand feast, do not ask for divination, and do not be extravagant.
Confucius said, "If you are respectful, you can use the sacrificial vessels. Therefore, a gentleman does not abandon etiquette for cheapness, nor does he abandon etiquette for beauty." Therefore, the etiquette of eating is: if the host personally presents the food, the guest will offer the food; if the host does not personally present the food, the guest will not offer the food. Therefore, if a gentleman is not polite, he will not eat even if the food is beautiful. The Book of Changes says, "The eastern neighbor slaughters a cow, but it is not as good as the western neighbor's sacrifice, which actually benefits him." The Book of Songs says, "After being drunk with wine, after being full with virtue." This shows the people, the people still compete for profit and forget righteousness. Confucius said, "Seven days of abstention, three days of preparation, carry one person to make a corpse, and those who pass by will run away, to teach respect." Li wine is in the room, Di wine is in the hall, and Cheng wine is below, to show the people not to be licentious. The corpse drinks three times, and the guests drink once, to show the people that there is a hierarchy. Because of the wine and meat, the clans gather together to teach the people to be harmonious. Therefore, the upper hall observes the room, and the lower hall observes the upper. The Book of Songs says: "The etiquette is complete, and the laughter is complete."
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