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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Then the bald people do not strip, the hunchbacks do not bare, and the lame people do not jump, not because they are not sad; if the body is sick, it is not suitable for the ritual. Therefore, it is said: the funeral ceremony is mainly about mourning. Women cry and mourn, beat their chests and feel sad; men cry and mourn, bow their heads and touch the ground, which is the extreme of sorrow.
Emperor Ming of Jin wanted to build a pond and terrace, but Emperor Yuan did not allow it. When he was the emperor, he was the crown prince and liked to keep warriors. The pond was dug in one night and completed before dawn. This is the Prince’s West Pond today.
Shi Chong and Wang Kai competed with each other in luxury and both used exquisite items to decorate their carriages and clothes. Emperor Wu was Kai's nephew and always supported Kai. He once gave Kai a coral tree, about two feet tall. The branches and twigs are luxuriant and luxuriant, rarely seen in the world. Kai shows respect. After Chong had examined it, he struck it with his iron ruyi and it broke into pieces. Kai felt sorry for it, but also thought that it was his treasure, so his voice and expression were very harsh. Chong said, "Don't be sad. I will return them to you now." He ordered his attendants to fetch all the coral trees. There were six or seven of them, three or four feet tall, with branches and trunks that were unparalleled and dazzling. There were many like Kaixu. Kai was at a loss.
When a sage sits south and listens to the world, he must first do five things, but the people do not follow them. One is to govern relatives, two is to reward merits, three is to promote the virtuous, four is to use the capable, and five is to preserve love. If one of the five is obtained in the world, the people will have no shortage and no one will be unsatisfied. If one of the five is wrong, the people will not die. When a sage sits south and governs the world, he must start with the human way.
When Ji Sun's mother died, Duke Ai went to offer condolences. Zengzi and Zigong went to offer condolences. The gatekeeper did not let them in because the king was present. Zengzi and Zigong went into the stable and dressed up. Zigong went in first, and the gatekeeper said, "The governor has already told us." Zengzi went in later, and the gatekeeper let him in. When they went inside, the nobles and officials all left their seats, and the Duke lowered his rank and bowed to them. The gentleman said, "If you use all your skills, you will go far." When Jiefu of Yangmen died, the city manager Zihan went in and cried. The Jin people who spied on Song reported back to the Duke of Jin, saying, "Jiefu of Yangmen died, and Zihan wept bitterly, and the people were pleased. It is unlikely that he should be attacked." Confucius heard about it and said, "How good is the spying on the country! The Book of Songs says, 'When the people are in mourning, they should be supported and clothed.' Although it is only a small country like Jin, who in the world can do it?"
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