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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Sima Wenwang asked Wu Hui: "How is Chen Xuanbo compared to his father, the Minister of Works?" Hui said: "He is well-versed in knowledge and can take the responsibility of educating the world. He is not as good as him. He is wise, concise and has made great achievements and achievements, which is worse than him."
When Su Jun was in chaos, all the Yu clans fled. When Yu Bing was the governor of Wu County, he fled alone, and all the people and officials left. Only the county soldier carried the ice out of Qiantangkou in a small boat, and Qu Shen overturned it. At that time, Jun offered a reward to recruit people to find ice, and the search was very urgent everywhere. The soldier left the boat and went to the market. He came back drunk and rowed towards the boat, saying, "Where can I find Yu Wujun? He is here." Bing was greatly frightened, but did not dare to move. The inspector saw that the boat was small and cramped, and thought that the soldiers were crazy and drunk, so he no longer suspected anything. He was sent to Zhejiang and sent to Wei's family in Shanyin, where he was saved. After the matter was settled, Bing wanted to avenge his soldiers, which was exactly what he wished. The soldier said, "I come from a servant family and don't want luxury. I suffered from whipping when I was young, and I'm always worried about not being able to drink happily. If I can drink enough for the rest of the year, I won't need any more." Bing built a big house for him, bought slaves, and kept a hundred hu of wine at the door for the rest of his life. At that time, it was said that this soldier was not only wise, but also understood life.
Gu Yanxian loved the zither all his life, and when he died, his family members often placed the zither on the coffin. Zhang Jiying went to cry for him, unable to bear the grief, so he went straight to the bed, played the zither, and after playing a few songs, he said while playing the zither: "Does Gu Yanxian appreciate this?" He was in great grief again, so he left his filial son's hand without holding his.
When Wen Taizhen was not yet in a high position, she often played Chupu with appraisers from Yangzhou and Huaizhong, and she never competed with them. Once he made a mistake, he lost a lot of things and was humiliated, with no way to return. He was on good terms with Yu Liang, and shouted to Liang in the boat, "Can you redeem me?" Yu immediately sent him money, and he was able to return. After these four.
Xi Jiabin asked Taifu Xie, "How does Lin compare to Ji?" Xie said, "Ji works hard, so he can be eliminated." He asked again, "How does Yin compare to Zhi?" Xie said, "You are superior, so Zhi is better than Yin. But you keep arguing, and I am afraid Yin wants to control Zhi."
Liu Jian served as the deputy governor of Huan Xuanwu, and later as a military officer of the Eastern Cao. He was quite unpopular because of his uprightness. I have listened to the record and was speechless. Xuanwu asked: "Why doesn't Liu Dongcao agree?" He replied: "It cannot be used." Xuanwu did not look surprised.
Hua Xin and Wang Lang both took refuge on a boat. There was a man who wanted to seek refuge, but Xin refused. Lang said, "Fortunately, there is still time, so why not?" Later, the enemy caught up with him, and the king wanted to abandon the people he was carrying. Xin said, "This is exactly why I was suspicious in the first place. Now that he has entrusted himself to me, why should I abandon him so quickly?" So he took Zheng with him as before. The world uses this to determine the superiority and inferiority of Hua and Wang.
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