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Arrogance cannot be allowed to grow excessive, desires cannot be followed, ambitions cannot be satisfied, and happiness cannot be taken to the extreme.
A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
Huan Xuan shot, there was a Liu Shen army and Zhou Shen army friends gambling, only less one broke Liu said Zhou said: "You are not broken here, I should attack you."
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
A guest once asked Chen Jifang, "What merits and virtues did your lord Taiqiu have to deserve such high reputation?" Jifang replied, "My lord is like a laurel tree growing on the edge of Mount Tai, which is ten thousand feet high and unfathomably deep. It is moistened by the sweet dew above and moistened by the deep spring below. At that time, how could the laurel tree know the height of Mount Tai and the depth of the deep spring? It didn't know whether it had merits or not!"
Lord Lin said to Wang Youjun: "The Chief Secretary has written hundreds of words, all of which are virtuous, but he seems to be sad that they are not bitter." Wang said: "The Chief Secretary himself does not want to make things bitter."
The head of the Kyushu island enters the emperor's country and is called Mu. Those with the same surname as the emperor are called uncles; those with different surnames are called uncles; they are called marquises in other places; they are called lords in their own countries. Those in the East Yi, North Di, West Rong, and South Man, although they are big, are called sons. In the inner court, he called himself "Bu Gu", and in the outer court, he called himself "Wang Lao". When the common people and minor dukes entered the emperor's country, they called themselves "so-and-so", and in the outer court, they called themselves "son", and they called themselves "gu". When the emperor should stand up, the dukes faced north to meet the emperor, which was called "Jin". When the emperor should stand up, the dukes faced east and the dukes faced west, which was called "chao".
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
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