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When Huan Xuan was about to usurp the throne, Huan Xiu wanted to succeed him because Xuan had the permission of his mother. Madam Yu said, "You are close, and you have more years than I do. I have taken care of him, and I cannot bear to see him do such a thing."
When Emperor Xiaowu of Jin was twelve years old, it was winter. He did not change his clothes during the day, but only wore five or six layers of single cotton clothes, and slept on a mat at night. Xie Gong advised, "Your Majesty's body should be kept in a regular state. Your Majesty is too cold during the day and too hot at night. I'm afraid this is not the right way to keep healthy." The emperor said, "Be active during the day and quiet at night." Xie Gong left and sighed, "You are no less rational than the previous emperor."
Zishang did not mourn when his mother died. His disciples asked Zisi, “Did your ancestors mourn their mothers?” He said, “Yes”. “Why did you not let Bai mourn?” Zisi said, “My ancestors did not lose the way; when the way was high, they followed the way; when the way was low, they followed the way. How could Ji do that? Those who marry Ji are Bai’s mother; those who do not marry Ji are not Bai’s mother.” Therefore, the Kong family did not mourn their mothers when their mothers died, starting with Zisi.
Yu Liang'er was killed by Su Junnan. Zhuge Daoming's daughter was Yu Er's wife. After she became a widow, she was about to remarry and wrote a letter to Liang about it. Liang replied, "The virtuous girl is still young, so it is appropriate. She is grateful for her lost son, as if he were still alive."
Confucius said: "The Way is not far from people. If people practice the Way and distance themselves from others, they cannot be considered the Way. The Book of Songs says: 'Cut the wood, chop the wood, its principle is not far away.' Holding a stick to chop wood, looking at it from a distance, it still seems far away. Therefore, a gentleman governs people by their own way, and stops when he changes. Loyalty and forgiveness are not far from the Way. If you do not want to do it yourself, do not do it to others. There are four ways of a gentleman, and I have not been able to do any of them. What I ask of my son is to serve my father, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my minister is to serve my king, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my younger brother is to serve my elder brother, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my friends is to give them first, but I have not been able to do it. The actions of a mediocre person are cautious; if there is something that is lacking, he dare not not try hard, and if there is something that is more than enough, he dare not use it all; if he speaks, he will act accordingly, and if he acts, he will act accordingly. Why does a gentleman not have to be frank!"
Therefore, if male education is not cultivated, yang affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the sun is eclipsed; if female obedience is not cultivated, yin affairs cannot be achieved, and it happens to be seen in the sky, the moon is eclipsed. Therefore, when the sun is eclipsed, the emperor wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six officials, and eliminates the yang affairs of the world; when the moon is eclipsed, the queen wears plain clothes and cultivates the duties of the six palaces, and eliminates the yin affairs of the world. Therefore, the emperor and the queen are like the sun and the moon, the yin and the yang, and they need each other to succeed. The emperor cultivates male education, which is the father's way; the queen cultivates female obedience, which is the mother's way. Therefore, it is said that the relationship between the emperor and the empress is like that between a father and his mother. Therefore, to wear mourning clothes for the emperor is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the father; to wear mourning clothes for the empress is the same as to wear mourning clothes for the mother.
Liu Ling was always indulging in drinking and being unrestrained. Sometimes he would take off his clothes and walk naked in the house, and people would laugh at him. Ling said: "I use the heaven and earth as my building, and my house as my clothes. Why do you want to enter my army?"
When meeting people, he should not remove mourning clothes, even when he goes to the court of the king. Only the government has to pay taxes and wear mourning clothes. It is said: "A gentleman should not take away people's mourning clothes, nor should he take away their mourning clothes." It is said: "If there are many crimes, the punishment should be five times, and if there are many mourning clothes, the mourning clothes should be five times, and the upper and lower should be attached to each other."
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