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Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
There was a man named Zhou Feng in Lu. Duke Ai held a seal and asked to see him, but he said no. The Duke said, "I'll stop!" He sent someone to ask him, "The Yu clan did not show trust to the people, but the people trusted them; the Xia clan did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. How did they get this from the people?" He replied, "In the ruins and tombs, they did not show grief to the people, but the people mourned; in the altars and ancestral temples, they did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. The Yin people made an oath, but the people began to rebel; the Zhou people made a meeting, but the people began to doubt. If there is no courtesy, righteousness, loyalty, sincerity and honesty to govern them, even if they are firmly united, will the people not break away?"
Duke Huan said to his guests: "Ayuan is a man of virtue and words. If he were appointed as an official, he would be able to set an example for the officials. The court is misusing his talent."
Someone asked, "Why do people bury their parents after three days of death?" The answer is: filial sons are sad and resentful when their parents die, so they crawl on the ground and cry, as if they will be resurrected, how can they be taken away and buried. Therefore, it is said that the funeral is held after three days, in order to wait for the body to be reborn. If the body is not reborn after three days, it is also dead. The filial son's heart will also be weakened; the family plan and clothing can also be completed; the distant relatives can also come. Therefore, the sages made a decision to set a three-day ritual system.
Zeng Zi asked, "When a envoy dies in his residence, etiquette says: public residences are restored, but private residences are not restored. In all countries where envoys are granted residences by officials, public residences are already public residences, so why do you say that private residences are not restored?" Confucius said, "What a good question! The homes of ministers, officials, and scholars are called private residences; public residences and official residences are called public residences. The restoration of public residences is what it means." Zeng Zi asked, "The lower dead: Tu Zhou buried in the garden, and then went there by carriage, because the road was close. Now the tomb is far away, how should it be buried?" Confucius said, "I heard Lao Dan say: In the past, Shi Yi had a son who died, which was the lower dead. The tomb was far away, and Zhao Gong asked him, 'Why don't you bury him in the palace? ' Shi Yi said, 'How dare I? ’ Duke Zhao told Duke Zhou about this, and Duke Zhou said, ‘Is it not possible?’ Shi Yi did it. The use of coffins and coffins for the deceased was first introduced by Shi Yi.
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