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When Cai Situ was in Luoyang, he saw that Lu Ji and his brothers lived in the three-room tiled house of the Assistant Director General. Shilong lived in the east end and Shiheng lived in the west end. Shilong is a gentle and cute person. Shi Heng was over seven feet tall, his voice was like a bell, and his words were often generous.
The mourning period is lived in the hut, and the mourning period is not allowed to go to the hut for the whole mourning period. If the father is still alive, the mother is still alive, and the wife is still alive; if the mourning period is the period of Qisui, and the mourning period of Dagong Busui for nine months, they will not go to the hut for three months. Women do not live in the hut, and do not sleep in the thatched. After the mourning of parents, go home after the mourning; if the period is nine months, go home after the burial. In the case of public mourning, the great officials wait for the mourning, and the scholars cry and go home. When the parents of a senior official or scholar are buried, they should return home after the funeral. On the anniversary of the death of the deceased on the first month of the lunar month, they should return home to mourn in the clan. When the father or brothers are buried, they should return home after the mourning. A father is not inferior to a son, and an elder brother is not inferior to a younger brother.
After three days, the body is buried. The body on the bed is called a corpse, and the body in the coffin is called a coffin. When the corpse is moved and the coffin is lifted, there are countless cries and jumps. The heart of pity and pain and the intention of grief and illness are strong, so the body is exposed and jumps, so as to move the body and calm the heart and lower the qi. Women should not expose their chests, so they beat their chests and jump, and they are as loud as a broken wall, which is the extreme of grief and pain. Therefore, it is said: "The body is jumped and wept, and the body is sent away with sorrow. The body is sent away and the spirit is welcomed back."
Zhuge Liang later entered Jin and was appointed Grand Marshal, but he could not be summoned. Because he had a feud with the Jin Dynasty, he always sat with his back to the Luo River. She was an old acquaintance of Emperor Wu, and the emperor wanted to see her but had no way to do so, so he asked Concubine Zhuge to call Liang. When she arrived, the emperor met with the concubine dowager. After the ceremony and when they were drunk, the emperor said, "Do you still remember our childhood friendship?" Liang said, "I cannot bear to see my body covered in charcoal and lacquer. Today I see your holy face again." He burst into tears. The emperor then left in shame and regret.
In mourning of parents, after the funeral, one should cry for the deceased, eat simple food and drink water, and not eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the minor auspiciousness, one should eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the major auspiciousness, one should eat soy sauce; in the middle of the month, one should mourn, and drink sweet wine during the mourning. Those who start drinking should drink sweet wine first. Those who start eating meat should eat dried meat first. In the case of parents' funeral, people live in a lean-to house, sleep on straw and a block of pillow, and do not wear mourning clothes; in the case of mourning of the first mourning period, people live in a whitened room, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; in the case of mourning of the second mourning period, people sleep on mats, and in the case of mourning of the third mourning period, people wear hemp and a bed. This is the way that grief is expressed in the place where one lives.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Pei Linggong looked at Xiahou Taichu: "He was solemn and awe-inspiring, like entering a temple. He did not practice respect but people showed respect to him." Yi said: "It was like entering an ancestral temple, where one could hear the sounds of ritual instruments. Seeing Zhong Shiji was like looking into an armory, where one could see spears and halberds. Seeing Fu Lanshuo was like looking at the Jiang Palace. Seeing a huge source on a mountain was like climbing a mountain and looking down, where it was deep and secluded."
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