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When Shan Xia left Dongyang, Wang Changshi wrote to him to ask for Dongyang's help, saying: "You have inherited the harsh policies, so you can achieve peace and order."
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
The same; the hemp of Qisui is the same as the hemp of Dagong; the hemp of Dagong is the same as the hemp of Xiaogong; the hemp of Xiaogong is the same as the hemp of Shi, if they are the same, then both should be worn. If the one who wears both is heavier, then the lighter one should be replaced.
When Duke Huan of the Han Dynasty was on his northern expedition and passed through Jincheng, he saw the willows he had planted when he was in Langya, all of which were ten feet in circumference. He sighed and said, "If trees are like this, how can people bear it!" He climbed up the branches and held onto the twigs, tears streaming down his face.
When Gu Rong was in Luoyang, he once accepted someone's invitation. He noticed that the person who was roasting meat wanted to be roasted too, so he stopped what he was doing. Those sitting together laughed at him. Rong said, "How can one hold it all day long and not know its taste?" Later, when he encountered chaos and had to cross the river, every time he was in danger, there was always one person by his side. When he asked him why, he found out that he was the one who was being burned.
When Wei Jie first crossed the Yangtze River, he met General Wang. Because he was sitting at night, the general ordered Xie Youyu. When Jie saw Xie, he was so pleased that he no longer paid any attention to the king, and they talked in silence until dawn. The king was not able to enjoy the night. Jie was always weak and was always forbidden by his mother. That evening, he suddenly became seriously ill and never got up again.
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