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The king’s parents and brothers, his uncle, his aunt, and his sister should be tabooed. The son should share the same taboo with his father. The mother’s taboo is taboo in the palace. The wife’s taboo is not mentioned by her side; if she has the same name as her aunt’s brother, she should be tabooed. For those who wear a cap in mourning, even if the mourning period is three years, it is OK. After the cap is worn in the second place, enter the palace to cry and dance, and do three times three times before leaving. For those who have the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons. For the father, who has the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons, and can marry their wives. Even if you have done a minor merit, you can wear a cap and marry a wife after you have finished crying; but for those who have done a minor merit, it is not allowed. All caps and mourning clothes should be worn with extravagant sleeves.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
Therefore, "The Book of Songs" says: "The great-grandson of the marquis family, the four correct ones are all raised; the great officials and the gentlemen, all the common people, small and big, are in the king's place, and they are entertained and arched, and then they are praised." It means that the ruler and the ministers devote their efforts to archery to learn rituals and music, and then they are safe and praised. Therefore, the emperor regulates it, and the princes are responsible for it. This is why the emperor supports the princes, and the soldiers are not used, and the princes are the tools for correcting themselves.
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