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Fu Gu is good at talking about empty victories, while Xun Can’s conversation is profound and far-reaching. Whenever they talked together, there were arguments and they could not understand each other. Pei Jizhou explained the meaning of the two families, understood the thoughts of both sides, and always made both sides feel satisfied and happy.
Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
Zeng Zi asked: "How can the sacrifice not be performed?" Confucius said: "I heard that in a minor auspicious event, the host performs the sacrifice without offering sacrifices, and offers sacrifices to the guests, but the guests do not raise them. This is the etiquette. In the past, Duke Zhao of Lu performed sacrifices and offered sacrifices to the guests, which was not etiquette; Duke Xiao of Lu performed a major auspicious event, but did not offer sacrifices, which was also not etiquette. "
The king’s parents and brothers, his uncle, his aunt, and his sister should be tabooed. The son should share the same taboo with his father. The mother’s taboo is taboo in the palace. The wife’s taboo is not mentioned by her side; if she has the same name as her aunt’s brother, she should be tabooed. For those who wear a cap in mourning, even if the mourning period is three years, it is OK. After the cap is worn in the second place, enter the palace to cry and dance, and do three times three times before leaving. For those who have the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons. For the father, who has the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons, and can marry their wives. Even if you have done a minor merit, you can wear a cap and marry a wife after you have finished crying; but for those who have done a minor merit, it is not allowed. All caps and mourning clothes should be worn with extravagant sleeves.
When Lord Gaogui passed away, there was an uproar both inside and outside the city. Sima Wenwang asked Chen Tai, the attendant, "How can we calm it down?" Tai said, "Only by killing Jia Chong can we thank the world." Sima Wenwang asked, "Can we lower this level?" Chen Tai replied, "We only see the upper level, not the lower level."
From benevolence to relatives, the order is up to the ancestors; from righteousness to ancestors, the order is down to the ancestors. Therefore, the way of human beings is to be close to relatives. Respecting the ancestors means respecting the clan, respecting the clan means gathering the clan, gathering the clan means the ancestral temple is strict, the ancestral temple is strict, the land is valued, the land is valued, the people are loved, loving the people means the punishment is moderate, the punishment is moderate, the people are at peace, the people are at peace, the money is sufficient, the money is sufficient, all the aspirations are fulfilled, all the aspirations are fulfilled, the rituals and customs are followed, and the rituals and customs are followed, and then there is joy. The Book of Songs says: "If you do not show yourself, you will not be disgraced by others." This is what it means.
Wang Yifu once was assigned to work by a clan member, but he hadn't done anything for some time. When they were having a feast, Wang Yifu said to the clan member, "You are assigned to work for an elder recently, so how can you not do it?" The clan member got very angry and threw a stick in his face. Yi Fu was speechless. After washing up, he took Prime Minister Wang's arm and was carried away together. He looked in the mirror in the carriage and said to the Prime Minister: "The way you look at me is like looking at an ox's back."
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