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The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
Ji Kang was seven feet and eight inches tall, with a very handsome appearance. Someone who saw it exclaimed, "It was solemn and clear, refreshing and clear." Someone else said, "It was solemn and clear, like the wind under a pine tree, high and slow." Shan Gong said, "Ji Shuye was a man who was as independent as a solitary pine tree; when he was drunk, he was like a jade mountain about to collapse."
Su Jun went to the east to attack Chen Chong, and asked Lu Mai, the Minister of Personnel, to go with him. When he was about to reach Wu, he secretly ordered his attendants to enter the Chang Gate and set fire to it as a demonstration of power. Lu knew what he meant and said to Jun, "Wu will not be peaceful for long and there will be chaos. If you want to be the cause of the chaos, please start with my family." Jun then stopped.
When Huan Xuan went to the capital, Yang Fu, who was then the deputy governor of Yanzhou, came from the capital to the gate with a letter saying, "Since I have been separated from the world, my heart is in turmoil. My wise sir should bring the morning light to the accumulated darkness and clear the hundreds of streams into one source." When Huan Xuan saw the letter, he hurriedly called him forward and said, "Zidao, Zidao, why are you so late?" He immediately made him a military officer in the record room. Meng Chang was Liu Laozhi's chief clerk. He went to the palace to express his gratitude and said, "Lord Yang, Lord Yang, our whole family depends on you!"
Zi Yun: "A gentleman forgives his parents' faults and respects their virtues." The Analects says: "If one does not change his father's way for three years, he can be called filial." Gaozong said: "For three years, he did not speak, and he would complain if he spoke." Zi Yun: "If one obeys orders without anger, gives subtle advice without getting tired, and works hard without complaining, he can be called filial." The Book of Poetry
When parents are ill, those who wear hats do not comb their hair, walk do not gallop, talk do not lazily, do not play the zither and the qin, eat meat without changing its taste, drink wine without changing its appearance, laugh do not laugh too loudly, and be angry without swearing. The disease stops and returns to normal.
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
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