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The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
Shi Chong and Wang Kai competed with each other in luxury and both used exquisite items to decorate their carriages and clothes. Emperor Wu was Kai's nephew and always supported Kai. He once gave Kai a coral tree, about two feet tall. The branches and twigs are luxuriant and luxuriant, rarely seen in the world. Kai shows respect. After Chong had examined it, he struck it with his iron ruyi and it broke into pieces. Kai felt sorry for it, but also thought that it was his treasure, so his voice and expression were very harsh. Chong said, "Don't be sad. I will return them to you now." He ordered his attendants to fetch all the coral trees. There were six or seven of them, three or four feet tall, with branches and trunks that were unparalleled and dazzling. There were many like Kaixu. Kai was at a loss.
Xie Kun was the prefect of Yuzhang, and he was sent down to Shitou from the general's rank. Dun said to Kun, "I can no longer do anything virtuous." Kun said, "Why? From now on, I will just die and leave!" Dun again claimed illness and did not attend court. Kun told Dun, "Recently, although your actions are intended to preserve the country, your true intentions are not understood within the four seas. If you can attend court with the emperor, the ministers will be relieved and all things will be convinced. Rely on the people's support and follow their will, and retreat to serve the emperor. In this way, your achievements will be comparable to those of Yi Kuang, and your name will be passed down for thousands of years." People at that time regarded it as a famous saying.
In this month, the emperor began to wear furs. He ordered the officials to say: The sky is rising, the earth is falling, the sky and the earth are not connected, and winter has come. He ordered all officials to cover and store carefully. He ordered the minister of justice to go around and accumulate, and collect everything. He destroyed the city walls, guarded the gates, repaired the keys and gates, carefully managed the flutes, strengthened the borders, prepared for the borders, completed the fortresses, carefully closed the bridges, and blocked the paths. He ordered the funeral rules, distinguished the clothes, and examined the thickness of the coffins, the size, height, thickness of the tombs, and the levels of the nobles and the humble.
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
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