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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Duke Xi amassed a fortune of tens of millions. The guests had different opinions and often asked about it in the morning. Xi family rule: Children and grandchildren are not allowed to sit. As the conversation progressed, the subject turned to money and property. Xi Gong said, "You just want to get my money!" So he opened the treasury for one day and allowed the money to be used as desired. Xi Gongshi Zheng said that the loss was about several million. The distinguished guest then begged his relatives and friends for help that day and the matter was basically resolved. When Duke Xi heard this, he was so shocked and surprised that he could not stop.
Xie Huzi once went up to the roof to smoke rats. Since Hu'er had no way of knowing what his father had done, he heard people say, "Only a fool would do such a thing." Joking about it. The saying of the time is not the only one that can make this mistake. The Taifu realized his ignorance and, following his words, said to Hu'er, "People in the world are slandering Zhonglang for this, and also saying that I was involved in this." Hu'er was upset and stayed at home for a month without going out. The Taifu falsely cited his own mistakes to enlighten others, which can be regarded as moral teaching.
Yu Zhigong had always had the ambition to rule the Central Plains, but he was not in a position of power during the reign of Emperor Wen and Kang. When Ji Jian became prime minister, he was wary of war and feared disaster. After discussing the similarities and differences with Zhi Gong for a long time, he finally took action. He mobilized the forces of Jing and Han and used all his boats and carriages to camp at Xiangyang. He assembled all the officers and soldiers, displayed their banners and armor, and personally taught them bows and arrows, saying: "This is how I shoot!" He then fired three times and folded his weapons, and everyone looked at him with all their might, and their morale increased tenfold.
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