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The etiquette of being a minister: do not make public remonstrances. If you remonstrate three times and he does not listen, then flee.
When Zigong asked about mourning, Confucius said, "Respect is the best, grief is the next, and thinness is the worst. The color of the face reflects the feelings; the sorrowful expression reflects the clothes." When asked about the mourning of brothers, Confucius said, "The mourning of brothers is recorded in the books and strategies. "A gentleman does not take away the mourning of others, nor should he take away his own mourning. Confucius said: "Shaolian and Dalian are good at mourning. They do not get tired for three days and do not stop for three months. They are sad for a long time and worried for three years. They are the sons of Dongyi. ”
What makes a person a person is courtesy and righteousness. The beginning of courtesy and righteousness lies in straightening the body, harmonizing the color, and smoothing the words. When the body is straight, the color is straight, and the words are smooth, then courtesy and righteousness are complete. So the relationship between the monarch and the minister is straight, the father and son are close, and the elders and the younger are harmonious. When the monarch and the minister are straight, the father and son are close, and the elders and the younger are harmonious, then courtesy and righteousness are established. Therefore, after the crown is worn, the clothes are ready. After the clothes are ready, the body is straight, the color is uniform, and the words are smooth. Therefore, it is said that the crown is the beginning of etiquette. Therefore, the ancient sage kings attached great importance to the crown.
The Youyu clan raised the state elders in Shangxiang and raised the common elders in Xiaxiang. The Xiahou clan raised the state elders in Dongxu and raised the common elders in Xixu. The Yin people raised the state elders in Youxue and raised the common elders in Zuoxue. The Zhou people raised the state elders in Dongjiao and raised the common elders in Yuxue: Yuxue was in the western suburbs of the country. The Youyu clan offered sacrifices to the emperor and raised the elderly in deep clothes. The Xiahou clan harvested and offered sacrifices, and provided for the elderly in Yan clothing. The Yin people offered sacrifices in a veil, and provided for the elderly in white clothing. The Zhou people offered sacrifices in a crown, and provided for the elderly in black clothing. All the three kings provided for the elderly according to age. A son of an eighty-year-old man shall not participate in politics, a ninety-year-old man shall not be involved in politics, and a disabled person who is not supported by others shall not participate in politics. In the mourning of parents, there shall be no participation in politics for three years. In the mourning of mourning for the eighth year of ... Father's teeth go with the father, elder brother's teeth go in a line, friends do not exceed each other. Light responsibilities are shared, heavy responsibilities are divided, and gray-haired people are not carried. Gentlemen and old people do not walk alone, and common people and old people do not eat alone.
According to the etiquette of eating, the meat is placed on the left and the stew is placed on the right, the food is placed on the left and the soup is placed on the right. Outside the roasted part, inside the vinegar and sauce part, at the end of the scallion part, and on the right of the wine part. For those who use preserved meat, the left side is the top and the right side is the end. If the guest descends to a lower level and holds the food to say goodbye, the host will say goodbye to the guest, and then the guest will sit down. The host invites the guests to offer a sacrifice: the sacrificial food and the sacrificial objects are presented first. Confusion of order, and offering sacrifices to all. At the third meal, the host invites the guests to eat the meat, and then they debate. If the host does not argue, the guest will not speak in vain.
When Huan Xuanwu conquered Shu, he took Li Shi's sister as his concubine and doted on her very much, often having her sit behind the king's throne. The master was unaware of this at first, but when she heard about it, she and dozens of her maids drew their swords and attacked him. Li was combing her hair. Her hair was hanging on the ground, her complexion was as white as jade, but she remained unmoved. Xu said: "My country is destroyed and my family is ruined, I have no intention of coming to this point. If I can be killed today, it is my real wish." The lord retreated in shame.
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