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Confucius cried for Zilu in the courtyard. There were people who came to pay their respects, and the Master bowed to them. After crying, he brought in the messenger and asked why. The messenger said: "It has been minced." Then he ordered to mince it.
When Emperor Wu of Wei died, Emperor Wen took all of Emperor Wu's palace ladies to serve him. When the emperor fell ill, Empress Bian went out to see him. When the Empress Dowager entered the house, she saw that the attendant was the one she once loved and favored. The Queen Mother asked, "When did you come?" He replied, "My soul is in hiding." She did not come forward and sighed, "Dogs and rats will not eat the rest of you, so death is inevitable!" When they arrived at the tomb, she still did not come.
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. 鈥 He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
When Zhao's mother married her daughter off, she warned her daughter before she left, "Be careful not to do good things!" The daughter said, "If I can't do good things, can I do evil things?" The mother said, "If I can't do good things, how can I do evil things?"
After He Huoqi died, he summoned Zhu Gong. When they arrived at Shitou, Wang Changshi and Liu Yin went to Zhu together. Zhu said, "What do you think of me, Zhen Chang?" Zhen Chang looked back at the king and said, "This boy is good at speaking." Zhu then looked at the king, who said, "The country has its own Duke Zhou."
If you shake a book or hold it upright before the king, you will be punished. If you put a tortoise upside down and sideways before the king, you will be punished. Tortoises, canes, mats, heavy white, and silk are not allowed in public. Bracelets, lapels, and hats are not allowed in public. Square books, mourning clothes, and ominous tools are not allowed in public unless they are reported.
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