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It is better to not be in decline than to be inappropriate. One should not sit at the side in mourning, and one should not serve in service for great achievements.
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
When Ji Wuzi finished his bed, he found that Du Shi’s burial was under the west steps, and he asked for joint burial there, and he agreed. He entered the palace but did not dare to cry. Wuzi said, “Joint burial is not an ancient practice. It has not been changed since the time of Duke Zhou. I allow the big but not the small, why?” He ordered him to cry.
Chen Taiqiu made an appointment with his friend to go out at noon. He did not arrive after passing the middle, so Taiqiu gave up. After he left, he arrived. Yuan Fang was seven years old at the time and was playing outside the door. The guest asked Yuan Fang, "Is your father here?" He replied, "I waited for you for a long time but you didn't come, so I left." His friend was angry and said, "What a cruel person! He made an appointment with someone and then left without saying goodbye." Yuan Fang said, "You made an appointment with my father at noon. If you don't come at noon, you are untrustworthy; if you scold your father in front of your son, you are rude." His friend was ashamed and got off the car to take him out. Yuan Fang walked in without paying any attention.
During the Zhongchao period, there were people who admired the Tao and went to Wang Yifu to consult about their doubts. The king on duty had talked a lot yesterday, and was very quiet, so he did not reply. He said to the guest, "I am not feeling well now. Pei Yimin is also here. You can go and ask him."
Yu (Ma Fei) of Kuaiji was a knight-errant like Huan Xuanwu during the reign of Emperor Yuan. He was a man of talent and reason who was highly regarded. Prime Minister Wang once said to (Ma Fei): "Kong Yu has the talent but not the reputation, Ding Tan has the reputation but not the talent. Who can have both?" (Ma Fei) died before he could achieve his goal.
Zi said: "A gentleman refuses the noble but not the humble, refuses the rich but not the poor, then chaos will be eliminated." Therefore, a gentleman would rather let people float above food than let food float above others. Confucius said: "If you give way to wine, beans and meat and accept the bad, the people will offend the teeth; if you give way to the seat on the lapel and sit down, the people will offend the noble; if you give way to the position in the court and accept the humble, the people will offend the monarch. "The Book of Songs says: "The people are unscrupulous, resenting one another; accepting titles without yielding them, they have finally died." Confucius said: "A gentleman values others and despises himself, and puts others before himself, so the people will yield to him." Therefore, call someone else's ruler "Jun", and call yourself "Guojun". Confucius said: "In the interests of salary, those who die first and those who live later, then the people will not be disloyal; those who die first and those who survive later, then the people can be trusted." The Book of Songs says: "The thoughts of the former rulers were kept by the gullible." With this, the people still disloyalty died and cried without complaint.
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