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When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
The Xia Hou clan preferred black; for major funerals, the dusk was used, and for military affairs, the black horse was used for riding, and the black horse was used for sacrifice. The Yin people preferred white; for major funerals, the sun was at noon, and the Han was used for military affairs, and the white horse was used for sacrifice. The Zhou people preferred red; for major funerals, the sunrise was used, and the horse was used for military affairs, and the red horse was used for sacrifice.
Xiahou Taichu and Chen Benshan of Guangling. Ben and Xuan were feasting in front of Ben's mother. Ben's younger brother Qian came back and went straight in and reached the door of the hall. Taichu then stood up and said, "We can achieve unity, but we cannot mix them."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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