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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Wang Changshi said to Lord Lin: "You are really rich in wealth." Lord Lin said: "With a rich wealth, why would you choose me?" Wang said: "I am not choosing me, I just don't have much to say."
There were many famous scholars in Sima Taifu's mansion, most of whom were outstanding at the time. Yu Wenkang said: "Seeing Zisong among them, he always thinks he is a god."
Xie Wan wrote an essay on the Eight Sages, which was a counter-argument to Sun Xinggong's, and the difference was slightly better. After thanking her, she showed it to Gu Junqi, who said, "I also made it, and I know you don't want to name it."
Duke Mu asked Zisi, "Is it ancient to return to serve the old monarch?" Zisi said, "In ancient times, gentlemen promoted people with courtesy and dismissed people with courtesy, so there was a ritual of returning to serve the old monarch; today's gentlemen promote people as if they were about to kneel down and dismiss people as if they were about to cross the abyss, and do not act like the head of an enemy, isn't that good! So why is there a ritual of returning to serve?"
Zi said: "A gentleman refuses the noble but not the humble, refuses the rich but not the poor, then chaos will be eliminated." Therefore, a gentleman would rather let people float above food than let food float above others. Confucius said: "If you give way to wine, beans and meat and accept the bad, the people will offend the teeth; if you give way to the seat on the lapel and sit down, the people will offend the noble; if you give way to the position in the court and accept the humble, the people will offend the monarch. "The Book of Songs says: "The people are unscrupulous, resenting one another; accepting titles without yielding them, they have finally died." Confucius said: "A gentleman values 鈥嬧媜thers and despises himself, and puts others before himself, so the people will yield to him." Therefore, call someone else's ruler "Jun", and call yourself "Guojun". Confucius said: "In the interests of salary, those who die first and those who live later, then the people will not be disloyal; those who die first and those who survive later, then the people can be trusted." The Book of Songs says: "The thoughts of the former rulers were kept by the gullible." With this, the people still disloyalty died and cried without complaint.
Wang Han was the governor of Lujiang County, and he was corrupt and shameless. Wang Dun protected his brother, so he said in front of everyone: "My brother was a good ruler in the county, and people in Lujiang all praised him!" At that time, He Chong was Dun's chief clerk, and he was also present. He said in a serious tone: "Chong is from Lujiang, and what he heard is different from this!" Dun remained silent. Others were tormented by his actions, but he was calm and composed.
Confucians do not fall in poverty, do not bend in wealth, do not be ashamed of the king, do not burden the elders, and do not pity the officials, so they are called Confucians. Nowadays, people call them Confucians, which is absurd, and often criticize each other as Confucians. "
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