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An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
Men and women do not sit together, use the same shackles and towels, or combs, and are not taught in person. The sisters-in-law and uncles do not ask about each other, and the mothers do not wash their clothes. External words do not enter the bundle, and internal words do not leave the bundle.
The one who is most benevolent has the most heavy mourning; therefore, for a father, he should wear mourning clothes for three years, which is a rule of benevolence. In the governance of the family, grace covers righteousness; in the governance of the family, righteousness cuts off grace. From serving the father to serving the king, and respecting the same, respecting the noble and respecting the elder, this is the greatest righteousness. Therefore, for a king, he should also wear mourning clothes for three years, which is a rule of righteousness.
When Tao Gong was young, he worked as a fish weir official and once offered fish crucibles to his mother as a reward. The mother sealed the fish and gave it to the envoy, and wrote back to rebuke Kan, saying: "You are an official, and you use official goods to pay the bills. Not only is it of no benefit, but it also adds to my worries."
Xi Jiabin admired the Buddhist and Taoist An Dewen, and gave him a thousand hu of rice and wrote him letters with piles of paper, expressing his sincere intentions. Daoan answered directly: "It will waste rice." He felt even more annoyed by having to wait for it.
Confucius said: "I ate at Shao Shi and was full, and Shao Shi fed me with courtesy. When I offered sacrifices, he stood up and said, 'Sparse food is not enough for offerings.' When I ate, he stood up and said, 'Sparse food, I dare not hurt my son.'"
General Wang arrested King Sima Min and sent General Shi to carry the king on a carriage and kill him at night, but no one knew about it at the time. Even the Min Wang family did not know all of them, and Wu Ji and his brothers were all young. Wang Huzhi and Wuji were very close when they were young. Once, when Huzhi was traveling together, Wuji went to his mother and asked her to prepare dinner for him. His mother cried and said, "Wang Dun was cruel to your father in the past and used him as a general. The reason why I didn't tell you for all these years is that the Wang family is powerful and you brothers are still young. I didn't want this news to be known, so I wanted to avoid disaster!" Wuji screamed in shock, drew his sword and ran out, but Hu Zhi had already gone far away.
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