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Confucius said: "To bring death to the dead is unkind and cannot be done; to bring life to the dead is ignorant and cannot be done. Therefore, bamboo cannot be used, tiles cannot taste good, wood cannot be cut, zither and qin are stretched but not level, 竽笙 are complete but not harmonious, there are bells and chimes but no bamboo shoots, which are called Ming vessels, which are divine."
The minister is the upper host, the minister is the successor host, and the scholar is the successor host. The king and his personal etiquette for guests, the guests meet privately, meet privately, offer food and drink, return the jade and jade, give bribes, and feast, so as to show the righteousness between the guests and the king and the ministers.
In mourning for parents, one wears a mourning hat with a tassel and straw sandals, eats porridge for three days, bathes for three months, wears a silk hat after thirteen months, and auspiciousness comes after three years. By comparing these three festivals, the benevolent can observe their love, the wise can observe their reason, and the strong can observe their will. Govern with propriety, correct with righteousness, and filial sons, younger brothers, and chaste wives can all be observed.
When Shan Gong met Ji and Ruan, they became close friends. Shan's wife, Han, noticed that the relationship between the Duke and the other two was different from usual, so she asked the Duke about it. The Duke said, “The only two men I could be friends with in those days were these two!” His wife said, “Fu Ji’s wife also watched Hu and Zhao in person and wanted to spy on them. Is that okay?” The next day, the two men came, and his wife advised the Duke to stay with them for the night and prepared some wine and meat. I climbed through the wall at night to look at it, and forgot to return until dawn. The Duke came in and asked, "What do you think of these two?" His wife said, "Your talent is far inferior to mine. We should just be friends because of our understanding." The Duke said, "They also always think I am better than them in understanding."
When the husband of an aunt or sister dies, and there are no brothers in the husband's party, let the husband's family members take charge of the funeral. The wife's party, even if they are close, do not take charge. If the husband has no family, then the front and back families, the east and west families; if there is none, then the village Yin will take charge. Some say: take charge, and attach to the husband's party.
When Wang Pingzi was sent out to be the governor of Jingzhou, Taiwei Wang and other wise men came to see him off promptly. At that time, there was a big tree in the courtyard, and there was a magpie's nest on it. Pingzi took off his clothes and towel, and went up the tree to pick the magpie. The cool clothes were caught on the branches and then taken off. When the magpie returned, he played with it, looking calm and composed, as if no one was around. The Taoist priest sat high above the Prime Minister and always lay beside him. When he saw Bian Ling, he changed his expression and said, "He is a man of etiquette."
Even if there are delicious dishes, if you don't eat them, you don't know their taste; even if there are the ultimate truth, if you don't learn it, you don't know its goodness. Therefore, only after learning can you know your shortcomings, and only after teaching can you know your difficulties. Knowing your shortcomings, you can reflect on yourself; knowing your difficulties, you can strengthen yourself. Therefore, it is said that teaching and learning complement each other. "The Book of Changes" says: "Learning is half done." Is this what it means!
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