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Zeng Zi asked: "What should be done if there is a funeral? What comes first and what comes later?" Confucius said: "In the funeral, the light is first and then the heavy; the offering is first and then the light; it is a ritual. From the beginning to the funeral, there is no offering, and there is no mourning during the funeral; after the funeral, there is an offering, and then say goodbye to the funeral, and then do the funeral. The funeral is first heavy and then light, which is a ritual." Confucius said: "Even if the son of the clan is seventy, there is no one without a mistress; if he is not a son of the clan, it is okay even if he has no mistress."
When Zhong Yu brothers were young, their father took a nap during the day, so they secretly drank medicinal wine together. His father woke up at the time and pretended to sleep to watch. Yu bowed before drinking, and drank together without bowing. Then he asked Yu why he bowed, Yu said: "Wine is the rite, I dare not not bow." He asked Hui why he did not bow, Hui said: "Stealing is not rite, so I do not bow."
When Ruan Ji was about to bury his mother, he steamed a fat pig, drank two buckets of wine, and then when he said goodbye, he bluntly said, "I am poor!" They all had to take number one, and because of vomiting blood, they were disabled for a long time.
Wang Youjun had always looked down on Lantian, but Lantian's praise for him increased in his later years, which made Youjun particularly dissatisfied. Lantian was in danger in Kuaiji, so he stopped at Shanyin to hold funerals. Youjun was in charge of the county and repeatedly expressed his condolences, but to no avail. Later he went to the gate and let in. The host was crying, so he did not go forward but left, humiliating him. As a result, a great rift between them arose. Later, Lantian was approaching Yangzhou. The Right Army was still in the county. When he first got the news, he sent a military officer to the court to request that Kuaiji be divided into Yuezhou. However, the messenger disobeyed the imperial order and was laughed at by the wise men of the time. Lantian secretly ordered his men to count all the illegal activities in the county, and since there was already a rift between them, he ordered them to deal with it themselves. Youjun then claimed illness and left the county, and died in indignation.
On the winter solstice, Zhou Boren's mother gave wine to her three sons and said, "I thought there was nowhere to go after crossing the river. Your family has a prime minister, and you all lined up before me, so what do I have to worry about?" Zhou Song stood up, knelt down and cried, "It's not as my mother said. Boren is ambitious but incompetent, famous but ignorant, and likes to take advantage of others. This is not the way to save himself. Song is a rebellious person and is not tolerated by the world. I am the only one who is idle and should be under my mother's eyes!"
When the senior officials and scholars meet the king, if the king is pleased with them, they shall step aside, bow twice and kowtow; if the king greets them, they shall step aside and dare not return the bow. When the senior officials and scholars meet, even if they are of different ranks, if the host respects the guest, he shall bow to the guest first; if the guest respects the host, he shall bow to the host first. Unless they are mourning or meeting the king, they shall return the bow.
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