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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Wang Xiaobo asked Xie Gong: "How is Lin Gong compared to Youjun?" Xie said: "Youjun is better than Lin Gong. Lin Gong was also noble before Sizhou."
Wang Zhonglang once asked Liu Changsha, "How am I compared to Gou Zi?" Liu replied, "Your talent is not as good as Gou Zi's, but you are famous in many places." Wang laughed and said, "You are stupid!"
The wise man treats others with familiarity and respect, and fears and loves them. Love something and you will know its evil; hate something and you will know its good. Accumulate and be able to disperse, be at peace and be able to move. When faced with wealth, do not be careless in taking it; when faced with danger, do not be careless in avoiding it. Don't seek to win, don't seek to get more points. When in doubt, do not question; be honest and do not boast.
Yin Zhongkan was well versed in profound theories, and people said that he had studied them. Yin then sighed and said, "If I could understand the four books, I would not be able to finish them."
The Master said: "Only the gentleman can love his righteousness, while the villain poisons his righteousness. Therefore, the friends of the gentleman have their own hometowns, and their dislikes have their own directions; therefore, those who are near are not confused, and those who are far away do not doubt. The Book of Songs says: "The gentleman likes enemies. '" The Master said: "If you lightly reject poverty and humbleness, and value wealth and honor, then your love for the virtuous will not be firm, and your dislike for the evil will not be clear. Even if people say it is not beneficial, I will not believe it. The Book of Songs says: "Friends have a place to control, and control with dignity. '" The Master said: "Private favors do not belong to virtue, and the gentleman does not keep them for himself. The Book of Songs says: "People love me, showing me how to walk around. ’”
When the meal is finished, the guest kneels in front and finishes the meal and gives it to the prime minister. The host stands up and says goodbye to the guest, and then the guest sits down. When serving drinks to elders, one must stand up when the wine is served and bow to receive it. The elder said goodbye, and the younger one returned to the table and drank. The elders raised the wine but it was not brewed yet, and the younger ones dared not drink. When elders give gifts, the young and the humble dare not refuse. When fruit is given to the king, those who have seeds should keep the seeds in their pockets. When I serve food to the king, and the king gives me other things, the parts of the vessels that are used to irrigate them do not need to be written, but the rest should be written.
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