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The way of the gentleman is expensive and hidden. The foolishness of a husband and wife can be understood, but when it reaches the extreme, even a sage will not know it. The unworthy husband and wife can do something, but when it reaches the extreme, even a sage will not be able to do it. The universe is so big, but people still have something to regret. Therefore, when a gentleman speaks big, no one in the world can contain it; when he speaks small, no one in the world can break it. The Book of Songs says, "The kite flies to the sky, and the fish leaps in the deep." It means that he is observant of everything. The way of a gentleman starts with husband and wife, and when it reaches the extreme, he observes the universe.
The kind and gentle are the root of benevolence; the cautious and respectful are the place of benevolence; the generous are the work of benevolence; the generous are the ability of benevolence; the polite are the appearance of benevolence Talking is the expression of benevolence; singing is the harmony of benevolence; dispersing is the application of benevolence; Confucians have all of these, but they still dare not say benevolence. Their respect and humility are like this.
When Wen Bo died, Jing Jiang sat on his bed without crying, saying, "In the past, I had Si Zi, and I thought he would be a wise man, so I never went to the public office; now when he died, none of my friends and ministers shed tears, but the women in the house all cried loudly. Si Zi must have been very unruly!" When Ji Kangzi's mother died, he laid out his underwear. Jing Jiang said, "A woman who does not wear clothes dare not meet her parents-in-law. There will be guests from all over the world coming. Why should she display her underwear here?" She ordered to remove it.
Wang Rong's father Hun had a good reputation and served as the governor of Liangzhou. After Hun died, the nine counties he had ruled over, because of his loyalty and kindness, came together to offer gifts worth several million yuan, but the Rong people refused to accept any of them.
There are six ways to serve: one is to be close to relatives, two is to respect the elders, three is to name, four is to go in and out, five is to respect the elders, and six is to follow the service. There are six ways to serve: following relatives, following disciples, following with service but not with service, following without service but with service, following the heavy and then the light, and following the light and then the heavy.
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