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When Deng You first sought refuge, he abandoned his own son on the road and saved his disciples. After crossing the river, he took a concubine and loved her very much. Many years later, when I asked him about the reason, I was told that he was a northerner who had suffered from rebellion. I remembered his parents' names and found out that he was You's nephew. You had always been a virtuous man with impeccable words and deeds. When he heard about this, he felt grief and resentment for the rest of his life and never kept a concubine again.
Then why is it three years? Answer: The closest relatives are separated by a period. Why is that? Answer: The heaven and earth have changed, the four seasons have changed, and everything in the heaven and earth has been renewed, so it is a symbol. Then why is it three years? Answer: It is to add more, so why double it, so it is a double period. Why is it from September to below? Answer: Why not make it less than that. Therefore, three years is a period of mourning, a small mourning is a period of mourning, and a period of nine months is a period of mourning. Take the image from the sky above, the law from the earth below, and the example from people in the middle, and the principle of human beings living together and in harmony is complete. Therefore, the three-year mourning is the most elegant of human nature, and this is called the most solemn. This is the same for all kings, and the same for ancient and modern times, but no one knows where it comes from. Confucius said: "After three years of life, one can escape from the embrace of parents; the three-year mourning is the most common mourning in the world."
Shooting is the way of benevolence. When shooting, you should seek to correct yourself. After you have corrected yourself, you can shoot. If you shoot and miss, you should not blame the one who beat you, but look for the reason in yourself. Confucius said: "A gentleman has nothing to contend with, so he must shoot! He bows and yields before ascending, and drinks after bowing. His contest is that of a gentleman."
When Jin Jianwen was the governor of an army, the dust on the bed he sat on was so thick that he could not even hear the dust brushed away. He could see the footprints of a rat and thought it was a good thing. A military officer saw a rat walking in broad daylight and ordered it to be killed with a board in his hand. The governor was unhappy with this and his men rose up in protest. The teacher said: "I cannot forget the fact that I was harmed by rats. Now, is it wrong to use rats to harm people?"
People at that time described Yu Zhonglang as "good at boasting and good at keeping himself hidden."
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