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Bo Gao died in Wei and went to Confucius. Confucius said: "Why should I cry? For my brothers, I cry in the temple; for my father's friends, I cry outside the temple gate; for my teacher, I cry in the bedroom; for my friends, I cry outside the bedroom door; for my acquaintances, I cry in the wild. In the wild, it is already distant; in the bedroom, it is already important. Since You Ci came to see me, I cried to Ci's family." Then he ordered Zigong to be the host and said: "If you come to cry for you, bow to him; if you know that Bo Gao came, don't bow."
When he descends, he puts on his shoes and sits, and he has countless cups. The etiquette of drinking is not abandoned in the morning and in the evening. When the guest leaves, the host bows and sees him off, and the etiquette is finally completed. I know that he can make the banquet peaceful and not chaotic.
Confucius said, "If you are respectful, you can use the sacrificial vessels. Therefore, a gentleman does not abandon etiquette for cheapness, nor does he abandon etiquette for beauty." Therefore, the etiquette of eating is: if the host personally presents the food, the guest will offer the food; if the host does not personally present the food, the guest will not offer the food. Therefore, if a gentleman is not polite, he will not eat even if the food is beautiful. The Book of Changes says, "The eastern neighbor slaughters a cow, but it is not as good as the western neighbor's sacrifice, which actually benefits him." The Book of Songs says, "After being drunk with wine, after being full with virtue." This shows the people, the people still compete for profit and forget righteousness. Confucius said, "Seven days of abstention, three days of preparation, carry one person to make a corpse, and those who pass by will run away, to teach respect." Li wine is in the room, Di wine is in the hall, and Cheng wine is below, to show the people not to be licentious. The corpse drinks three times, and the guests drink once, to show the people that there is a hierarchy. Because of the wine and meat, the clans gather together to teach the people to be harmonious. Therefore, the upper hall observes the room, and the lower hall observes the upper. The Book of Songs says: "The etiquette is complete, and the laughter is complete."
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