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Arrogance cannot be allowed to grow excessive, desires cannot be followed, ambitions cannot be satisfied, and happiness cannot be taken to the extreme.
When Zhong Yu brothers were young, their father took a nap during the day, so they secretly drank medicinal wine together. His father woke up at the time and pretended to sleep to watch. Yu bowed before drinking, and drank together without bowing. Then he asked Yu why he bowed, Yu said: "Wine is the rite, I dare not not bow." He asked Hui why he did not bow, Hui said: "Stealing is not rite, so I do not bow."
Shi Chong and Wang Kai competed with each other in luxury and both used exquisite items to decorate their carriages and clothes. Emperor Wu was Kai's nephew and always supported Kai. He once gave Kai a coral tree, about two feet tall. The branches and twigs are luxuriant and luxuriant, rarely seen in the world. Kai shows respect. After Chong had examined it, he struck it with his iron ruyi and it broke into pieces. Kai felt sorry for it, but also thought that it was his treasure, so his voice and expression were very harsh. Chong said, "Don't be sad. I will return them to you now." He ordered his attendants to fetch all the coral trees. There were six or seven of them, three or four feet tall, with branches and trunks that were unparalleled and dazzling. There were many like Kaixu. Kai was at a loss.
The head of the five officials is called Bo: this is the official position. Those who are excluded from the emperor are called the emperor's officials. Those with the same surname as the emperor are called uncles; those with different surnames are called uncles. They call themselves the emperor's elders in front of the princes, and they are called dukes in other places; they are called lords in their own countries.
He Yan was the Minister of Personnel and held a prestigious position. His room was always filled with guests for conversation. Wang Bi, who was not yet twenty years old, went to see him. Yan heard of Bi's name, so he cited the superior theory of the previous one and said to Bi: "I think this theory is the best, can you challenge it again?" Bi then challenged, and everyone in the room thought he was inferior. So Bi acted as the host and the guest several times, but each time he was better than others.
What makes a person a person is courtesy and righteousness. The beginning of courtesy and righteousness lies in straightening the body, harmonizing the color, and smoothing the words. When the body is straight, the color is straight, and the words are smooth, then courtesy and righteousness are complete. So the relationship between the monarch and the minister is straight, the father and son are close, and the elders and the younger are harmonious. When the monarch and the minister are straight, the father and son are close, and the elders and the younger are harmonious, then courtesy and righteousness are established. Therefore, after the crown is worn, the clothes are ready. After the clothes are ready, the body is straight, the color is uniform, and the words are smooth. Therefore, it is said that the crown is the beginning of etiquette. Therefore, the ancient sage kings attached great importance to the crown.
Yu Changren and his brothers entered Wu and wanted to stay overnight in a pavilion. The younger brothers went up first and saw the room full of children, none of whom had any intention of avoiding each other. Changren said, "Let me try and watch it." He then took a little boy with a stick and entered the door. The guests, seeing his divine appearance, retreated and hid themselves for a while.
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
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