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In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
From the emperor to the common people, all of them take self-cultivation as the foundation. If the foundation is chaotic and the end is in order, it is not good. What they value is despised, and what they despise is valued. This is called knowing the root, and this is called the ultimate knowledge.
When Grand Tutor Xi was in Jingkou, he sent his disciples to write to Prime Minister Wang, asking for a son-in-law. The Prime Minister said to Xi Xin: "You can go to the east wing and choose anyone you like." The disciple returned and told Xi Xin: "The young men in the Wang family are all commendable. When they heard that you were looking for a son-in-law, they all behaved politely. Only one young man was lying on the bed with his belly exposed, as if he didn't hear anything." Xi Gong said: "This is exactly what we want!
Foreign affairs are firm on the day, and domestic affairs are gentle on the day. For divination days: those outside the ten days are called distant days, and those within the ten days are called near days. Funerals are preceded by distant days, and auspicious days are preceded by near days. It is said: "For the day, if you use the tortoise shell, there is a regularity, and if you use the divination stick, there is a regularity."
"No! In the beginning of Lu, the royal family looked at the Fengbei, and the three families looked at the Huanying. In the same way, if someone's mother was skilled, then can't you do it? Is his mother skilled? Is she sick? Alas!" He didn't follow it.
A woman shall be buried with her great-grandmother. If there are three great-grandmothers, she shall be buried with the close ones. If the wife is a senior official and dies, and then her husband is no longer a senior official, but is buried with her wife, the sacrifice should not be changed; if the wife dies and then the husband is a senior official, and is buried with his wife, the sacrifice should be that of a senior official. A descendant of a father does not wear mourning clothes for his mother. The reason for not wearing mourning clothes is that the mourner does not offer sacrifices. A woman who is not the master and is caned: the aunt is caned for the husband, and the mother is caned for the eldest son. A daughter's son is in the house for the parents, and the master of the mourning does not wear a cane, then the son alone can be caned.
"Confucian scholars are approachable but not robbed; they can be approached but not forced; they can be killed but not humiliated. Their residence is not lewd, and their food is not humid; their mistakes can be slightly identified but not counted. There are such people who are resolute. Confucians have loyalty and trustworthiness as armor, propriety and righteousness as oars; they act with benevolence and live with righteousness. Even if there is a tyranny, they will not change their position. They are like this in their self-reliance.
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